How do you have the conversation with your client where it’s going to take way more money to pay me than it would to just resolve this dispute by just doing (x thing your client would rather drink antifreeze than do…..until they see the bill)…..

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Just tell them. Their money their choice.

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This. And get the funds in trust up front. I always tell people: my commodity as a lawyer is time, so if you really want X, I need Y up front.

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This happens regularly for me... "I am ethically obligated to advise you - In reality, as unpleasant as it may be, Executing "X", will be financially advantageous for you/your company, in comparison to the costs of legal services in an effort to avoid doing "X". While I understand that sometimes clients choose to make a stand, in this instance it appears that no one will benefit from pursuing the current course other than the attorneys. Also, in reality, the litigation process is filled with uncertainty. While I am a skilled advocate, and while I think your position is the stronger of the two, Judges are human and, therefore, sometimes inconsistent. The cost benefit analysis really calls for you to do "X". It is, however, your call. But I need to be honest that the one who most stands to benefit from further pursuing this approach is my firm and the plaintiff's firm. Let me try to briefly negotiate a better resolution. If that doesn't work, I suggest conceding and saving resources for a different fight/day/project". But, If your choice is to continue to fight, I'm here for you and we will press hard for your preferred result."

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Tell them their potential exposure and the range of defense fees to get you to MSJ including likelihood of being successful. Sometimes clients aren’t ready to hear it so they just have to keep going with the process until they finally get it. Unfortunately for them if they want to keep fighting but then ultimately settle, they end up paying more (fee shifting cases) or they end up paying what I told them the case would settle for, but after they’ve racked up significant defense fees. If you’ve advised them fully (and should do it in writing), you’ve done your job. And what P2 said - get a substantial retainer up front and replenish before significant work like MSJ briefing or trial.

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If the client is at least mildly sophisticated, I prepare a budget showing where my time will be spent on the case (and the resulting fees). That sometimes helps the client understand that I am not just "saying this" to avoid working the case or am not exaggerating.

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Common problem. I tell them straight up that the cost to deal with the problem is larger than the problem. I emphasize the often overlooked burden on their time (and how intrusive) discovery will be. I sometimes use examples like: you will have enough to take your wife on a once in a lifetime vacation. I find most clients need representation against themselves.

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