I can’t decide whether some partners hate me or are just sort of rude.

Or perhaps both.

Is there anything to do here—like approach the partner for more feedback? Or, just play through?

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Not enough information. What are they saying or doing to make you question their behavior towards you?

For me, regardless of what they are doing, I would approach them in a diplomatic way at least once.

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So, you’ve seen them behave like this to several others at the firm? It could be part of their personality. Turning on the charm for clients could be their acting job. Many of us lawyers are either part-time actors or salesmen in front of the “important” clients. I’m not kidding! I’ve seen it, but if this is part of their general personality around everyone in the office, try not to let it bother you.

One piece of advice I would give you is to stay consistent around them. If you’re cordial today, remain cordial tomorrow.

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My guess is they have general hate for associates and maybe specific hate if you're a woman or person of color. And they are rude otherwise.

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This is also known as autism

Well, autism is so broadly defined now it is rather difficult to know.

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