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Same! It was my way of telling them that we are going to be okay. How do you feel about sharing salaries with friends/extended family from back home who “didn’t make it out”? I struggle with that a lot
I try to be sensitive to the topic, especially if I know they don’t make as much as me. But if anyone asks, I have no issue sharing numbers. Figure they appreciate transparency as much as I do.
hi! I was the OP to the thread you linked :) I started that discussion because I recently got promoted and was shocked to hear my salary increase especially after a restructuring at pwc. But I currently live at home in a house my parents took a mortgage on so I could go to a better public school and increase my changes at getting a high paying job out of college. I make more in one paycheck than my mom makes in a month. So Im currently paying off the mortgage. But I didn’t tell my mom the new salary, only that I can contribute more to the mortgage. Because she has a history of guilt tripping for money. If i tell her what I make, she will make me feel bad for spending more on myself, my trips, and my own life. She’ll ask why I just don’t pay off the entire house as soon as I can. Why do I do that? Because I don’t feel alive. Im 24 and paying a mortgage because apparently my parents birthed me to pay them back. I need to keep my salary for myself so I can keep a part of my future dreams and goals to myself. I won’t let them steal any part of my goals. I am not alive right now, Im just being a good daughter. I would be so happy to see her brag to her coworkers about my salary, which is proof of her success as a mom. But once she knows my number, she’ll analyze all my spendings and try to take away my life
Hey PwC1, thanks for sharing. I can relate given we both do our share to help our parents but completely understand your reasoning for not wanting to tell them the number if they guilt trip you and try to control you. Similarly, using your comparison it actually sounds crazy to me as I type this that I make in one paycheck basically twice as much as my mom does in one month.
It’s tough right - do I give them enough to survive, do I maintain a comfortable lifestyle for them, at what point does that take away from my comfortable lifestyle?
Do whatever you need to do to protect your happiness!