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Hello fishes,i have two offers, one is from Cognizant- Senior Associate for 22LPA(fixed) and EY GDS - Assurance, Technical Lead (rank 42) for (23 Lpa + 10% Variable). Which one should I choose? Expecting better Work life balance is priority. I'm into .Net full stack development. (6 yoe). Please help who knows about EY Gds bangalore and CTS Coimbatore. Cognizant
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First, chin up for yourself AND because your response is always being watched. Don't let fleeting emotions impact your brand and future opportunities. You nevef know. Next, congratulations, and pat yourself on the back for being a contender. As we go up, there are fewer spots, and being in the running is also a validation that you have what it takes. Then feel the feelings, but put a time limit on it, and then get back to remembering and feeling like you're the sh*t and take a big whiff. Because the longer you're down, the harder it is to come back up. This is a setback, not the end of the road. It's also a chance to critically examine whether or not this was exactly what you wanted. Often, it's 80 or 90%, and as time passes, the universe reveals that it's even less than that. Find something that fits like a glove.
That's so very true. I do feel like more eyes are on me. Thanks for bringing that up. I'll make sure to watch my emotions especially while I'm at work :)
I think you need to put your big girl pants on and act as a leader. Always remember that others are watching your reaction. You yourself said the other person was deserving, they had to make a decision. It generally always works out for one reason or another. I think taking time off just signals a lack of emotional maturity. This stuff will happen again.
Thanks! You're right
It’s tough and you have every reason to be disappointed. Try to regain control by doing a few things:
1/ ask for feedback gracefully as we all have blind spots and you may learn something you weren’t aware of. Be clear that you’d still want to be considered for promotion
2/ congratulate the winner and if/when it feels right build/strengthen that relationship in case it helps with future opportunities
3/ take time over the Christmas period if possible to grieve the loss and recharge for the new year
Love this so much! I feel much better just hearing from amazing women like you. Thanks for your guidance through this fragile period of mine. So grateful for this community
I would love to hear what the other female bosses on the group have to say about this because I went through a very similar situation last month. It was really tough but I had to stay because jobs don't come that easy to me. I'm just grateful I have one in this landscape where people are struggling even to have one.
If I were you I would talk with the decision makers and get feedback regarding what I should have done better to get it and make a plan for getting it in the next promotion cycle with clear and measurable metrics. Set up recurring review meetings specifically for the promotion progress discussion. Promotions need to be worked on and you have to make sure you’re on the right direction.
Believe me sometimes managers don’t remember all the great things you did and you have to keep reminding them. Plus what they are using as a metric might not be what you’re working towards the most. For example, working long hours when needed shows great work ethic, but that might not be the most important thing I’m looking for when promoting my reports.
It does happen a lot and it’s justified to feel horrible when you don’t get what you think you deserve. But in the meantime don’t just trust managers would know who is more ready for the next level, work with them, manage up, help them to help you get there! One year difference in the long term doesn’t matter that much. If it makes you feel better, check some external jobs, interview with some, and see how you like it. It’s always nice to have options and leverage for a level and salary review.
Hope this helps and best wishes!
I refer to this as feedforward sessions. The idea is don’t tell me what I did wrong, it’s about telling me what I should do next time or anytime in the future.
I had a similar situation to OP, and asked for the opinions of what went right and what they were looking for that I didn’t match. About a year later, a new position was created based on some of the talking points I brought up in my interview. It was bigger than what I described, but the kernel was there. I interviewed for that job and I got it.
Sometimes a failed interview ends up opening a new opportunity. Keep doing it! You got this!
I’m sorry this happened to you. It sucks. Being disappointed is normal. I think taking some time off to reset is fine if you need it. But the reality is, often there is more than one deserving person for a given position. I can’t tell from your post if you’ve done this already, but after you’ve dealt with the emotion, have a frank but professional conversation with your leader about why you were not selected. Enlist his/her help in working toward the next one. See how it goes. Over time you’ll get a feeling about whether or not you are in the right place, and you can keep your eyes open for other opportunities. I don’t think being passed over once for a promo automatically means they don’t value you or that you are not in the right place. And the grass is not always greener, so do remember that as well and don’t be hasty with your career moves.
I haven't had a conversation yet, but I guess your comment is nudging me to do it. Thanks for sharing your thoughts. Appreciate it
It’s often who is liked better by management, sad to say.
I agree you should get feedback and use it as a learning experience.
Busting your butt is often discounted.
You're right. Thanks for your comment
Your work does not love you back. Do what is in your best interest. Are you too valuable to promote or some other reason (that is unintentionally self-limiting)?
I say take a few days off for yourself and don’t give them any inkling that you are sad. See what else is out there too, it may help you make your decision to stay or go. Best wishes from someone who was upfront with her management and they turned on her. Keep your feelings to yourself, yes I nearly threw up in my mouth when I said that because it sucks, but they will always be used against you.
'your work does not love you back'. Need to really understand that. It sucks though, especially when you try so hard to give it the attention and love you'd give a baby.
I had this happen to me for years at my old company until I realized no matter what I did, the sad reality was that they did not take me seriously or want me to move up. I totally feel you OP, it is sad and disappointing and I’m sending you hugs. Much like what others are saying, keep trucking along, but know that work does not love you back and you have to do what’s best for you. Take some time off, put feelers out for jobs. It’ll feel good when you can give your 2 weeks.
Thanks for this <3
You are definitely overreacting if you want to look for another job. There are almost always multiple people that should get promoted into the role we are looking for. Sometimes we don't know things the other people did to be more deserving. Sometimes there are multiple people all deserving at the same level. Then what do you do as a leader. It's hard being on the other side too. I've been on both. Sometimes I see a better opportunity more in line with someone's skill sets and feel they will be more successful there so if there are two people with the same skills, dedication everything I have to choose like it or not.