We’ve been attending a church for about 6 months now and trying to decide if it’s our church home. The only reason I’m hesitant is because people don’t seem to engage with us as much as I expected. For example, I told the pastors wife about a serious diagnosis we recently received and she did pray for us on the spot, but no one has reached out to us at all to check in. Am I expecting too much?

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Is it a a big church? Join a small group and get involved. Can’t just attend sundays and expect much.

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Not making excuses, but it could be she didn’t share it with others if she thought it was private or should be kept confidential, maybe she thought you’d tell others if you wanted them to know. As far as checking in with you, there’s a lot of expectations and pressure on the pastor’s wife and it isn’t always appropriate. Look into their other ministries throughout the week and join a group. Reach out if you need more support - sometimes there’s a prayer group or somebody to organize meals if you need it etc. You can usually speak confidentially with a deacon or some other leader. I do agree it is hard to feel connected sometimes. How are you engaging with others? You also have to put yourself out there a bit, whether it’s right or not, you can’t expect everyone else to put in all the effort.

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We also haven’t been able to be as involved as we’d like to be due to pregnancy! My husband has been volunteering though. After 6 months I was hoping we’d feel more connected to people

That’s valid. I’m planning to get involved when our newborn is older so it sounds like my expectations might be a little high for the level of effort I’m able to put in right now. Thanks all!

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