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As someone who’s been at this for 13 years and just got diagnosed with an autoimmune disease…it’s not worth it
10 years in developed a new variant of an autoimmune disease
The resume experience and skills growth you receive from more time and promotions at a Big 4 will compound into massive lifetime earnings vs. exiting at the senior associate level, even if you leave public later on. Keep telling yourself that.
Massive lifetime earnings…..Someone has been partner a little to long
Decide how much the money is worth to you. No one is forcing you to work those hours.
You are not alone. Everyone's doing what you are doing. They gain chronic illnesses and sacrifice relationships. Many, if not most, still end up in the same place (career wise) as the smart people who never grinded in big four. Big four experience no longer differentiates you in a way it used to.
Pro
For what it's worth - I took a medical leave (burnout) and was included in a massive layoff at my firm shortly after I returned. I landed on my feet very quickly because of my resume at that firm which led me to burnout. I might have just gotten lucky but I turned out ok. If you're laid off (and not terminated for poor performance), you just have to be candid about what happened and chances are high they already saw on the news. Take care of yourself. The medical leave put me in a much better position physically and psychologically. And I'm making a little more now.
Always take care of yourself first. Nothing is worth your health, mental or physical.
Everyone’s experiences are different but not taking time off does not equate to a high performer. I’d rather have people who are great at their job and take a reasonable about of time off then a below/ average performer who has high utilization. In that example I would imagine in most cases the person who is below/ average will be laid off before the person with average utilization but is a high performer when they work.