BREAKING: A grand jury has DECLINED to indict the former-DOJ employee who threw a sandwich at a federal officer in DC.

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Assault with a deli weapon is not a felony

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I always thought you could indict a ham sandwich.

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Everyone knows that the grand jury found the sandwich responsible and indicted it

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People don’t hurt people, sandwiches hurt people

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You have a bizarre definition of breaking news.

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Look man, I’m just engagement farming for Toiletbowl, don’t overthink this

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That is the greatest news.....

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