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Yeah I’ve been there. I was horribly introverted when younger and my career in public helped me come out of myself. It takes work and the small talk will be “work” but you can practice and plan for it. Make yourself find friendly questions and topics, smile and show an interest. Try to find your comfort zone... I e woman to woman, older, married, younger, etc. get a good hobby and keep it active for yourself but also share it.... ie I’ve gone to 48/50 states. Stay off politics, etc. work at it, read books on it, etc. and you’ll get there. Be authentic and truly to like people not just having a career agenda in mind. Keep in mind most people really feel like you do. I’m not comfortable with silly or trivial talk, so I just avoid it. I would rather talk about a deep topic or thought provoking topic.
Mentor
You get better at it. Also they care a lot more if you come off as the most competent. I’ve had really good chatty people on my team but they would prefer me because I knew what the f was going on with their stuff. I did work on being more chatty and nice but it never came naturally to me.
The office I am in the one of the partners and one of the directors are the most awkward at small talk. I think small talk is only a small part. Yes, you need to be memorable but it can be in different way.
To succeed you need a certain x factor, enough to have management back you to go up the chain, the super awkward partner is a technical whizz.
One of the SM pegged for success in my office is super abrasive but is an absolute audit machine, and the other rising star SM is the best at politics and is a “cleaner” (solves issues and makes your worries disappear)
You need to find your strengths and totally hone in on them and make that part of you stand out.
In terms of small talk, most people are people at the end of the day, they have families, hobbies, own fears / hopes etc. Sport, hobbies, families, food, popular TV shows, holiday, even weather are all good safe go to and once you have common ground it gets easier!
Also people love talking about themselves, ask a few questions and they will do the talking!