flying to a destination wedding tomorrow and just realized I didn’t buy a gift. do you think it’s okay to send something directly to the couple after the wedding? i’m also of the belief system that if you make your guests travel 3000 miles you shouldn’t expect gifts but it’s one of my oldest friends so it’s someone i’d make an exception for lol

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You can definitely send it after. I got married last year and gifts trickled in for the next month or so. I also agree that you shouldn’t feel obligated to give a gift when you travel that far. I typically give something small and personalized when I travel for a wedding or am in a wedding like a personalized ring dish or “first married Christmas” ornament. I have gotten really good feedback on these gifts and they are affordable.

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attending destination weddings is the gift

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No one takes a gift to a wedding these days. Card with check, electronic gift card or gift delivered after they are back from any honeymoon is perfectly gine. Most registries stay up for a year. Apparently gifting after is more of a thing now. Some people don't like the thought of people opening and using the wedding gifts months in advance.

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Yes, it’s totally fine. It’s preferred to send a gift vs bring one to a wedding anyway.

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Destination weddings are utterly obnoxious- expecting people to attend that is. Your presence should be present enough. Of course if you don’t have one, the selfish couple will likely think ill of you. Welcome to the age of entitlement. Isn’t it grand?

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Who hurt you? No one is forcing guests to attend a destination wedding and any couple who thinks “ill” of a guest who made the sacrifice to travel but didn’t bring a gift is immature.

Speak for yourself.

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Traditional wedding gift etiquette is three months to a year after big day. Don't sweat it.

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