Hello ladies, I need your personal experience in interviews!
I talk with people with enthusiasm and kindness. And I’ve been receiving negative interview outcomes. Specially if the recruiter is a woman. My partner (tech professional, male, very serious), always encourage me to send”thank you notes” and “follow up emails” after. And I think this is making me look desperate and as evidence, I never get replies from those emails/messages, and offers for those roles!
What are your thoughts on this?

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I once interviewed for a company. About 10 interviews and sent very specific follow up emails for each interview; this is what we discussed, my key take aways, selling myself a little more, next steps. Not a single person responded to my emails, BUT when I got hired and started at the company they said that was the reason they hired me. As in, that was the thing that stood out from the rest of the candidates. It also gave them a view into how I handle business; how quickly and accurately I send thank you/follow up emails, as it’s also good practice in the real working world.

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I was doing the second one, sending the follow-up and thank you message for the sake of sending one. Maybe with a hint of our conversation, but totally [only] for being polite.
That was good advice! Thank you!

Additional info, the offers I received up to now was for roles I didn’t care about! Or even forgot to follow up! So anything I am interested, boom, gone!
And as an example, one company with HR rejecting me, is always pursuing unwilling candidates which ofc resulted in a very low retention rate.

I would argue that this makes you look professional, not desperate. Do they supply (or do you ask for) any feedback once the interview outcome is known? You may be able to get some useful information from them this way. Keep going. You will get there. Good luck :)

The last one didn't reply to my thank you email (5 hours after the interview) and the follow-up email (10-12 days after). I received the automatic decline email a few hours after my follow-up email. We had a good initial call and she was going to get back to me after the interview with their follow-up steps, but she never did. I didn't email her again asking for reasons since I had this nagging (my post) feeling/assumption after that!
But I will try asking next time! Thanks for the tip!

I think it’s rude to not send thank you notes - I write super detailed ones about what I learned and enjoyed about the convo, reaffirm my interest in the position. I actually think this helps you get jobs, I always do super well in interview processes and usually make it the the final round. When I was fresh out of college in 2018 I wrote emails to every person I met with and sent hand written letter to each of them for the role I really wanted (this is probably overkill if you’re an experienced hire), but I got my dream job because of it and when I started people mentioned it was super thoughtful and helped me stand out. These thank you emails are also a great opportunity to highlight any experience or information about yourself that either wasn’t covered in the interview or something you want to reiterate based on the interviewer putting emphasis on the importance of a specific skill or capability. I aim to send within 24 hours / 1 day of the interview or if it’s a Friday I schedule it to send first thing Monday morning so they’re immediately reminded of me and it doesn’t fall to the bottom of their inbox.

I have interviewed for hundreds of jobs and written many thank you throughout these processes, I can count on one hand how many thank yous have received a response so I just want to say that is completely normal - employees are urged not to respond as the company doesn’t want to show their hand or get candidates excited when they’re interviewing multiple people.

In the instances of recruiters, I always try to avoid excessive follow up. I only follow up if I haven’t heard anything in 2 weeks, you have to realize that they are trying to coordinate schedules of people at the company and other candidates so things take time. Whenever I have the chance to talk to recruiters on the phone I always ask for updates on where they are in the process and when I can expect to hear about next steps. I think this stops you from stressing unnecessarily about not hearing back or following up too much.

As far as actual interviews, do a mock interview with someone in your industry or a trusted professional mentor who can give you concrete feedback on your interview skills. Are you explaining your experience well without rambling? Do you have a strong elevator pitch? These are hugely important as it’s usually the first impression any interviewer gets of you (besides your resume).

Are you asking good questions? Good questions can help you stand out SO much in comparison to other candidates and the wording is important. A lot of people ask “what’s the culture like?” 👎🏻 instead ask “what makes someone a good culture fit at xyz firm?”.

Some of my other favorite questions:
- when you were interviewing at xyz company, what did you learn during the process that made you want to join the firm? (Also gives insight to the culture)
- how has the firm developed you?
- if i joined and a year from now you were congratulating me on a job well done, what would I have accomplished? (This has actually been proven to help you land jobs because the interviewer starts to think of you in the role, great to ask the hiring manager or senior leaders)
- do you have any reservations about my candidacy? (This gives you great insights into their thought process and also the opportunity to address any concerns)

It’s also a bad job market and really competitive out there so don’t beat yourself up, the right thing will come along!

Fully agree with what McKinsey said.

Sending thank you notes, especially if thoughtful and relevant to what you spoke about makes you stand out. But I’m still not likely to respond because I’m busy - hiring is like having a full time job on top of my regular full time job. Unfortunately I simply don’t have time to follow up with everyone who sends a thank you or an ask for an update, so I generally don’t send any in an attempt to be fair.

Sending me multiple emails expressing how interested you are in the job and asking for an update is not helpful. Do it once, then leave it unless I encourage you to follow up again with me at a latter date. Hiring for Microsoft, at least, always takes 2x as long as we’d like, so it’s not uncommon to go several weeks without hearing anything.

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