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A referral can be valuable as it lets you cut the line, and it usually can get you an interview. If you didn't even get an interview then it might have been obvious that you weren't qualified. Or, if you had been interviewed, perhaps that came through in conversation. The thing with a referral is that it can get you an audience, but that's it, you still have to win it on your own.
Yes. It isn't a magic bullet though. Their recommendation doesn't outweigh a lack of qualifications and required experience. If you don't possess them (not saying you don't), it's unlikely there's anything they could have said that would've changed the outcome.
Same thing happened to me. I’ve wondered why also
Referrals can sometimes make a difference but not all the time. It is still possible that even with a referral, you weren't the best fit for the job. It does carry weight to get a referral but not if you aren't the right fit for the job.