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It’s all on you. If you can’t notice that your employee is struggling in a small team, you’re a terrible manager. There are no excuses.
Rising Star
This is really helpful, thank you. I like the idea of being more intentional about setting expectations for 1:1s instead of assuming people will automatically open up. Also, the point about leading with vulnerability especially resonates.
Pro
I think the best thing to foster “safety” in 1:1s is to be mindful of how you speak to and about your direct reports outside of the 1:1s. If you’re on email threads/meetings and they make a statement that someone shuts down, try to have your direct report’s back. If they know that you’re on their team in all areas of work, it will lead to a lot more candor when you meet just the two of you.
Rising Star
That’s a good point. I do feel like I always have my team’s back, that’s just how I operate, but you’re right that psychological safety is built in all the small moments, not just in 1:1s. It’s still a helpful reminder as I reflect on this.
Pro
I have a great manager and I enjoy my job, but I wouldn’t indicate I was leaving until I already had a signed offer.
Perhaps also remember that not everyone is capable of being honest with what they are struggling with & it could be a case that your company were not able to offer them the growth they wanted. It isn’t always about the manager
Sometimes it’s easier to say that you were struggling than to admit that you changed jobs for the money and promotion. Especially if you’re close with your boss
Rising Star
That’s a really good point. It’s probably easier and less awkward to say someone was struggling than to admit they’re leaving for money or a bigger role, especially when there’s a good relationship with the manager. Thinking about it that way helps make more sense of the gap between the 1:1 conversations and the exit discussion.