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35 F🐟, Boston, 🙋
Any M 40+ in Nairobi? The apps here are not it!
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Ladies would you take dinner and shoes from me?
Early 30s, Female, Texas. Indian Ethnicity. HMU!
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So in your head you are exclusive already. Why not say it to her and see what she thinks
It makes me so happy to hear this from a man! I definitely feel the same way that if we’ve slept together, I feel weird going on other dates and feel more committed. I guess what’s the harm in bringing up exclusively the next time you see her or getting an understand of where her head is at. If you’re not in the same place, then you can move on and meet someone who is. Good luck!
Wow. This is so refreshing. Thank you for being a respectable man!!!
Play the field. You aren’t exclusive
Pro
Go on the date! Nothing is official or exclusive until it’s discussed
Good decision IMO
More context.
She asked what my plans were for tonight. I would have had to lie or tell the truth, which is uncomfortable after having had sex with someone the night before.
She is going to be in my neighborhood for dinner tonight with a friend, and my 1st date was going to be in my neighborhood too. So there was a possibility of running into her.
But mostly, it was guilt about doing things behind her back and not being honest. I would have had no issues going on this other date if we hadn't slept together yet, but given that we have been intimate, it feels different.
I understand where you're coming from and respect your feelings of not wanting to get involved with someone else after you've slept with someone. This is how it should be. For too many people, especially men, sex does not equal commitment. Too many women have then been conditioned by other men to let their options open until the man *explicitly* brings up commitment in a conversation.
It's unfortunate that people have to hedge like this emotionally but these are the times we live in...
Also, I'm fairly certain she isn't seeing other people even though we haven't discussed exclusivity. Wonder if this changes perspectives.
Also, I recognize that at the end of the day, people will feel differently, and it's an individual decision.
I feel you’re not THAT into the person you slept with. Not yet, at least. Which is normal, you‘ve only seen her 3 times. Perhaps you are hopeful that someone better might come along, but if not, you’re afraid you’re gonna lose the first woman too.
I don’t think the sex lady expects you to be exclusive after 3 dates, but maybe she doesn’t want to see you with someone else yet, either.
Sounds like she WANTS something serious. In which case, it’s not ok to go on a date if you’re considering a relationship with her too, in the long run. You’d just start on the wrong foot.
Good decision!!
Was the sex good? Do you want to have sex with her again. If yes and yes, then don’t go on a date with anyone else.
Oh this is a tough one! I think maybe you and the current girl may have moved too fast in the sack prior to getting to know each other better. Now that you have taken the plunge I see why you would feel guilt in going out with another person, even for a lunch date. If you can see this current relationship turn into a girlfriend and you really like her, then skip the other dates. If you are unsure, then I would go out with other people, no sex and let the current girl know you are still dating other people. You could end up losing her though so.....maybe just keep her and see where it goes. Until you know for sure, keep seeing the one girl. It can get too messy and super stressful juggling more than one female at a time.
I laugh… it’s obvious you’re such a novice—very inexperienced when it comes to women. Do you really think the woman you slept with isn’t seeing other men? Since there’s been no discussion of exclusivity, keep dating and keep your options open.
Of course a man responds this way! Women DO NOT think like men!! PERIOD!!!!
It’s adorable that you think the woman you slept with isn’t seeing other guys lol
First, you need to talk to the person on if you both are serious about each other and get that out of the way. Secondly, It’s actually a good thing you didn’t go on that other date while still pursuing someone else. When you’re already emotionally involved and have been intimate, seeing someone new can create unnecessary confusion and hurt for everyone involved. It’s important to focus on one connection at a time to give it a real chance and be fair to yourself and the other person. Dating multiple people while still figuring things out can make it harder to understand what you really want and can lead to mixed feelings or misunderstandings. Taking the time to be clear about your feelings before moving forward with others shows respect and maturity.
Pro
spin plates my friend.
That's great, go on with her.
If you don't have the energy or the moral character to pursue multiple people, then don't.
There's no highscores in life, what is important is living a life that makes you feel proud.
Are *you* proud of how you are behaving?
Accept that having a strict moral code for yourself means you will miss out on opportunities. Which is more important to you: acting on your values, or grabbing every opportunity.
There is no shame in either path, but do it with both eyes open and own who you are. Do not do it because "you'd feel guilty", do it because you're doing what you believe in your heart is what the person you want to be would do.
If that doesn't resonate with you, then no, bad decision. If it does, then walk tall. You'll only be happy when your actions align with the path you choose for yourself.
I would see how this meeting with the second person goes, and then go for there. You didn't know you were going to meet that person to begin with. If nothing else, go slower.