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People go through periods where life is just hitting you. In 2023, I dealt with two family emergencies, was the maid of honor in two weddings, got such a bad stomach flu I ended up in the hospital because I was throwing up blood, our washing machine flooded overnight while my fiance was on a work trip so I blocked off an entire morning to deal with that, our dog had three bouts of diarrhea where we were juggling who would take her out every five minutes (we are in an apartment so no yard) and constantly cleaning the apartment, and went through Hurricane Beryl where we woke up (somewhat unexpectedly as it ended up being much worse than forecasted where we are) with zero power, zero cell service, and zero ability to relocate to find the same due to flooded roads and the fact that the hurricane went on several hours longer than expected so winds were insane. I basically ghosted until 2 pm or so when a neighbor with a different cell carrier that had some service (I guess ours lost a tower or whatever) graciously lended their hot spot so we could contact our jobs. Was fully offline during a busy period for 1.5 days until we could safely relocate to a hotel, and this was two weeks after I had to take 2.5 days off for my stomach flu.
Everyone was super nice and understanding through everything, and given how burnt out I was from work being generally busy all year and having a personal disaster every other week, I wouldn’t be working here anymore if anyone had given me any serious grief. I met with my partner mentor before reviews came out and he asked me how things were going and I expressed some concerns that I had become “the person something is always happening to” after I had developed a reputation for being super reliable, which I valued, especially because I can lean on it when needed - I have lots of appointments due to a chronic illness. He shook his head and was like I already got to see your reviews, they were just as amazing as always, and yes you don’t want to be that person but sometimes things do happen constantly, that’s life, and people can tell when it’s genuine - especially if you’re already really well liked. It’s very hard to lose a good rep.
I’ve also found that other people often have things like doctors appointments, kid/pet/family emergencies, etc. come up just as often but are way less communicative about it. They either just don’t respond for an hour or they just say they had another call/conflict and are vague. I am super over communicative to the point that some intense partners have encouraged me to be less responsive for my mental health, but as a supervisor sometimes I get frustrated when folks aren’t fully honest because 1) I want to help! and 2) it helps me plan and cover for you to have an idea that you’re dealing with a kid with the stomach flu as opposed to just another work call. But some folks are genuinely more private and sometimes even prideful so they don’t always share.
The point is that you are far from the only one dealing with this stuff. Life happens and others may just not be as open about it (or maybe only telling one trusted person, etc.). Hang in there! I absolutely get this feeling but I wouldn’t worry about it so much if you’re otherwise reliable and well liked.
(Also I feel like I should’ve mentioned, all of my teams are West Coast / Midwest so I was the only one affected by the hurricane and it wasn’t quite national news yet lol so it wasn’t like the whole team was affected or everyone just immediately knew)