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Indian here and the guest will likely die from overeating and force feeding 😂
I swear every time I go to my inlaws' house I gain 5lbs. And it's compounded by the fact that I love spicy food, spicier than my wife and her whole family. Everybody wants to see the white boy put away that spice.
I could eat all regional Indian food everyday.
From my personal experiences, Indians and Middle Easterns are most hospitable when it comes to guests; I have always enjoyed being treated like a king at my Indian friends’ homes.
I believe I did mention “personal experiences” in my original comment, and unfortunately, I have never experienced African hospitality.
Definitely different. In Middle Eastern culture we roll out the red carpet for the guest of the house. They get the main seat at the table.
Same thing with the Indian culture. I still remember when I was a kid and would get so excited when guests would come over. There were so much food, fancy dinnerware, clean house, dressing in better clothes etc.
Note to self - always bring a bag lunch if visiting someone from Sweden.
I mean if it’s a widespread thing that’s normal there, whatever. But for me personally, I could not imagine not feeding a guest! Anytime I brought a friend home from school, the first words out of my dad’s mouth (after hello) would be “you kids hungry? Did you already eat?” And I definitely adopted that myself as well. I offer people food or a drink just about anytime they step foot in my home, down to the maintenance staff who come by when something in my apt needs a repair — I at least offer water/soda/coffee. But again, that’s just how I was raised and that’s normal to me. If not doing that is normal somewhere else, I guess… oh well. But I’d hope they are aware enough to inform those who might not know.
Yep, my cleaning lady gets a latte everytime she comes to my house!
I had a childhood friend who must be Swedish. Any time I was visiting during dinner, I had to go wait outside on the porch.
I always ate with my own family before/after going over. Nobody was starving me.
This happens, and I never thought twice about it growing up. Also not uncommon (probably more common) to make it a good time for the guest to leave at dinner time.
There are explanations for this cultural phenomenon covered in the media recently too - but basically I comes from 1) the actual need to make sure your food supply lasted the winter (it is dark and cold up here!) and 2) the perception that someone else had to provide food for you kid because you couldn’t.
So it can actually be perceived rude to feed someone else’s child without asking the parents first (which also happens).
Curiously enough, this is also why the “fika”-culture is strong; coffee (or whatever the drank back then) is non-essential and provides a reason to socialize outside the family meals
Source: Born and raised in Sweden
So, clarifying, you don’t want to infer that the parents of the visiting kid would not be able to feed him/her by feeding them outside their own family.
Also, while we are no longer poor as a country - we used to be in the 1800’s. A fair share of the population at the time emigrated to the US (who would have guessed, right). Still bunch of Swedish inheritance around Minnesota (primarily - guess people stayed where it felt most like home).
Also, being strict with the use of your resource (i.e. budgeting) meant that you were able to NOT starve or be as poor although the actual resources were scarce.
The cultural behavior stem from the hundreds of years of history that we have as a nation. Not how well we have done for ourselves in the last 50 years. And of course people have over time moved away from this, especially the ones who are well-off and who know that their kids’ friends families are also well-off - since it eliminates the need for this cultural norm.
FYI: There is an interesting episode of Economics Explained on YT that outlines why economies in cold countries tend to do better. Spoiler: The inherent need to save up and plan consumption is an important part of the explanation
/Your friendly Swede
I have been based with a Nordic client after working with deloitte colleagues across the world and it’s horrible culture wise. So horrible I have even considered resigning or ending project early.
Nobody asks how you are etc, coffees etc are very rarely offered they do not see any point in socialising outside of work even if they know you have no family here - no culture of offering welcome dinners etc like I have experienced at other offices.
It’s cold, and feels unkind. But they seem to be the happiest on most polls! Maybe the happiness comes from being like this but it’s just weird to experience it and super isolating when you are based here for work by your company.
Is it funny that you should say that. I (Swedish) have lived in the states and have worked with American colleagues. More than anything it frustrated me how hard it is to get to the point where you have meaningful discussion with (new) friends/colleagues.
Sure, you ask me how I’m doing and what I did over the weekend. And you are great at pretending to care for a little bit before letting the convo die out.
Swedes, on the other hand, are notoriously unwilling to strike up a conversation with strangers / people the so not know well. But if you actually get them talking you can actually get into quite interesting conversations way sooner. Swedes will share their weaknesses and concerns - while Americans mostly just boast.
Obviously both generalizing and exaggerating tremendously - but you get the point. Better to be directionally specific than approximately right.
Wait what? So in other cultures they do not feed guests?
I live in Sweden and it is not like that with any family I have encountered. ,
Chief
They have food shortage or something? Should we donate? 🤣
Brazilian living in southern part of the US over here and I try to be respectful of other people’s culture it if that happened to me I would just leave. I plan meals for other people months in advance because I am just so excited to cook for them.
Rising Star
What, they can’t throw a couple of Swedish meatballs your way?
I have some frozen veggie ones I could lob in an emergency, but the recipient/victim may need a shield
Coincidentally, I read an interview yesterday where the lady was mentioning growing up in Germany as a kid, she experienced the same, had to wait in her friends room when the whole family was having dinner 😳 how can you do that to a kid?!
As a Swedish descendant, I’ve never heard of not letting guests eat with the family. In fact my family often hosted others. So I call BS.
Were the others swedes too?
It probably isn’t that pronounced if you’ve been born and brought up in the states.
Lol def different
I have yet to experience this at all with any family nor have i heard of it anecdotally. Living in Sweden.
This is viral in my home country as well. People seemed to be shocked about that you don't get any food 🤔
Where are you from EY 1?
Pro
Is this for real?
Rising Star
This can’t be real, can it?
Chief
C1, That is entering my vocabulary immediately🙏
Rising Star
I refuse to believe this