The week of my wedding, my husband (PL SQL Developer 4 yoe) was laid off. That was a couple of weeks ago. Luckily I'm still bringing money in as a software engineer, but I'm looking for advice on how to support a partner who has been laid off. Ultimately I think we will be ok, but I know he's hurting / stressed / and could use a supportive partner.

likehelpful
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I’m so sorry to hear this and that this occurred during a time where you should be celebrating your love with all of your family and friends. 💜

My husband was just laid off (we worked at the same company). It’s been so hard to cope with this. The thing I am doing now is just reassuring him everything will be ok in the near future, he isn’t the only one going through this, and that it isn’t his fault. What has been helpful in supporting my husband is asking him how he is doing, reassuring him how he feels is valid, and sharing the mutual feeling he has. I try to focus on the people who have been showing us emotional support and care rather than on the negativity, some days are harder than others.

In your situation, I would really try to encourage him to set a boundary and separation from the situation in the days leading up to and following the wedding. Moments like this don’t happen again and as hard as it is try to be present and focused only on that. Try to talk through this with him and see what he needs to get into a positive mindset for the wedding. Health and family mean so much more than a job and you guys will be ok! I hope this could help in some way and that you still enjoy your wedding 💜🙏🏽🍾congrats 💍

likeuplifting

This is a hard message to follow.

I may be mostly speaking for myself here when I say this. Just being present, a gentle touch and smile, hand holding, leaning against him etc. go a long way. Being able to sit together and share the silence and a touch are comforting. I love it when my partner genuinely asks me how she can help even though she knows that’s a “tall order”.

It feels great to be comforted even when we think we don’t need it in times like this.

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