Related Posts
Do cover letters matter at all anymore?
How was you memorial day weekend?
Any idea about google project in HCL ?
Pro
Thoughts on Transfix? Anyone invested?
Pro
Additional Posts in LGBTQIA+ 🐠
Anyone Boston next week?
Rising Star
Chief
Conversation Starter
Any Brooklyn people wanting to network/chat?
Gay men in NYC?
Pro
New to Fishbowl?
Download the Fishbowl app to
unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.
unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.
There's a nuanced answer to this but you standing up for trans people/rights is/was the right thing to do.
Whether you overreacted I can't say without having been there to know how you said it or what you said. If it's a deal breaker for you, then it's appropriate to end the evening over it. No one here can tell you if it's a deal breaker for you.
most trans people are just attention seeking and I think they should pick a side."
I was honestly shocked and disgusted by this comment, and he could tell. He went on to say he agrees that people are born with their sexual orientation but being trans or non binary is a choice. I argued that gender is a feeling, and the only reason it seems like a trans or nb person is "choosing" a gender is bc being cis is the default, and they were usually assigned a gender at birth that mismatched their experience, and they had to go and figure out their actual gender over time.
He doubled down and said "gender is just pronouns, it has nothing to do with feelings. You pick pronouns, and i will use them, doesn't mean I have to understand or agree that you're not just playing dress up"
The argument got fairly heated and I ultimately told him I was really disappointed to learn that he held these beliefs. It's been awkward and tense ever since.
Did I overreact? Could I have said anything to more eloquently explain my position?
I would encourage them to invest some time learning and understanding more about trans experience. If they're a reader, I like the book Trans Like Me by CN Lester. I am not in a relationship currently and it would be difficult for me too in your position.
Sorry I know this isn't really work related but didn't know where else to ask this 😖
You both have differing views. Ain’t nothing wrong with that.
Are they dealbreaker differences for both of you though?
For me, I’d be hurt of the blanket statements of anyone being different to “seek attention”. Literally, the same argument can be applied to gay men.
Can trans people in sports truly be solved when neither side wants to compromise? A compromise I propose is just make a third category. I’d root for whomever + it would make sports very interesting. I know that is even controversial and may seem insensitive, but I feel it maintains a space of uniqueness for folks while giving them a chance to compete. It would also kneecap the right’s agenda.
Some people are just born with more testosterone, others born to be taller, some faster, and some are everything they should be except weren’t born into a family that could or would support them in sports. So to me, they have yet to invent a sport that’s truly fair. As long as they are trying to be as fair as possible, I don’t see any issue with anyone competing in anything.
Time to find a new partner whose values align with yours.
It's about the same mindset that trans people want us to accept. Trans people want to be accepted at all levels of transition including just pronouns. Non trans people equate ALL levels of transition with transition completed,AND retain the mindset of what people were born with. So,it doesn't have to be surgical or medically induced...