When a male colleague gets direct feedback, it’s called leadership development. When I get the same feedback, it’s framed as tone management or softening my approach. It’s wild how the same behavior is interpreted completely differently depending on who’s doing it. Anyone else feel like feedback in consulting is just coded language for gender bias half the time? How do you handle that without sounding defensive or losing your mind?

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I think your perception is reasonably grounded in reality. Gender bias is pervasive and subconscious, globally. With that being said, try to take an objective stance around what areas you can improve upon. It’s not about what you’re saying, it’s about how you’re saying it. Know your audience and tailor to them. Alternatively, you may not have the right work environment. Good leaders should empower their employees with transparency.

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it’s not just gender frankly in some organisations feedback is just hr and management outsourcing their need to filter out people the don’t want or don’t want to give pay rises or bonuses especially when this feedback is captured via HR systems

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https://www.psychologicalscience.org/news/minds-business/women-face-backlash-for-speaking-up-at-work.html

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