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Rising Star
I think this is most staff everywhere. It’s not just you.
I've only ever had this problem with one assistant. She was young and thought she was too good for the job. Otherwise, I've always had good working relationships with my staff. I treat them with respect from the start (not saying you don't) and they respond with the same. I've always explained that I have certain preferences, but I'm open to hearing about better ways to do things if they have ideas. Sure, a partner's request will almost always take priority, but I've had staff offer to stay late to finish things for me many times. I suspect it's a firm culture issue.
My staff respect me, but I definitely have fights with my other partners over the help I need. Our rainmaker still frequently treats me like his senior associate, and I have to put my foot down and remind him I am doing my own BD, have my own clients and manage my own schedule, and that I’m entitled to resources as well.