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I don’t think has anything to do with being neurodivergent… it’s just about networking and asking directly as you say..
I would just ask directly. I think people resepect you more when you just come out with it versus beating around the bush.
I feel this a lot, it can be tough to navigate social situations like this with ADHD because I don't want to burden them or ask them for more than they can give, but I also want to leverage myself into the best position possible ideally with their help. The only time it's been easy is when it naturally comes up in conversation or the other person asks about my job searching process.
I would just straight up ask. That is what I have always done. I find it best to just be transparent and ask someone directly rather than just beating around the bush.