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I think it depends on your relationship with the couple. I've been invited to a few where I didn't feel close enough to justify going. On the flip side, one of my best friends got married in Jamaica a few years ago, and it was the best wedding I've been to because of the location and the fact everyone there was really close-knit. If that's what you want to do, I'd go for it. It'll inevitably prune down the guest list, but I don't think that's a bad thing.
I’m anti destination weddings. I love to go to weddings and celebrate people in my life, so I would never want to skip it, but it’s so burdensome to have to spend that much money and vacation days. It’s your choice to do what you want of course, but it will annoy at least some percent of those you invite.
i think this is a know your audience type thing on if you think it’s within reason for your guests. i have a destination wedding next month that’s like $530 a night for the resort in mexico.. and then the flights were $600-700. over $2k just to attend for a wedding is an annoying amount to spend for not one of my closest friends , and it’s frustrating that someone’s wedding is preventing me from having that money for say a vacation of my own, but i know some groups welcome destination weddings
OP. If one of the big considerations for you is wedding size/costs. Then, just set your budget and determine the guest count that can support. Rarely does anyone not a BFF get hurt feeling for not being invited.( unless you both have such huge local families that just inviting them leaves no room for your friends... and in that case, you will get a ton of pushback from your parents about not having it locally) Make it adult only. Count all your friends you want to invite that fit in your budget. People you have done something socially with in the last year. ( texting counts, liking a post on FB does not). See how many spots are left. Allocate those to each family. Tell them if they want more, the incremental cost is.... whatever it is - probably $250 a head when you count tax, service charge, etc. If they want to pay the difference over their allocation, great. If they want to teir their invitations to add others after you get some declines, fine. But if the count changes your venue commitment, they need to pay upfront.
Your parents will either say, "Okay, we will help, or we will work with this number." They might complain, but the cost is what the cost is. And if they complain about that, you can bet they will complain about the expense of whatever destination you pick.
My brother is doing a destination wedding. I thought at first it was fun, but it’s become beyond expensive and they are doing multiple parties and showers leading up, separate 3-4 day bachelor and bachelorette, and then the destination wedding (plus an after event/ party for those not invited to destination). My husband and I are in bridal party and groomsmen and it’s my brother, so expectations are heavy to participate in everything. I’d say you should check with your family and those in your parties to ensure they are good with destination and price.
I saw you mentioned you are going to invite 300 people to destination wedding. If I received an invite like that, I’d assume the couple was just fishing for more money/gifts and would be turned off, unless I was really close to them. I think moving to destination wedding should naturally cut your list to those very close to you.
I totally hear you on the separate parties. I absolutely would want this to be the only event we have although I assume I will lose the battle on not having a wedding shower (mom/grandma feel strongly we need one)
This is such an it depends. If most of your friends/family aren't local to you, anywhere can end up seeming like a destination wedding to your guest. That was our case. Ended up my extended family came, only his immediate family came, despite telling his mother they would. All our close friends came. It was at a resort in the US. People loved it, but most just flew in Friday and left Sunday and we negotiated a significant discount on the room rate. We had a few who cane in early and stayed later. In general people like to pick their own vacations.
And you will never really know who will or will not travel. Consider if it will be easily accessible by direct flight for most of your guests. Will they also have to rent a car? When you get over $1500 to $2000 a couple unless its a well-heeled group, your numbers drop way off.