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Why are you stressed. Your work your ass off, enjoy yourself. It’s your money.
You might need to do more introspection as to the source of the stress. Is it just the way you were raised? Is it because you have bigger picture goals or passions that are more important and other non-necessities keep you farther from achieving them? Basically figure out if the stress is coming from a rational place and make a budget to align your actions with your desired outcomes. It's okay to be austere if you're doing it for the right reasons for you, even if all your friends spend more freely. But don't just let yourself stress for no reason.
This is a great point. OP, I'm the same way. I'm almost certain it has to do with my upbringing (my parents were immigrants to the US and we had very little until I was 10). In many ways, it's a blessing (I save a TON) and a curse.
It could be the way you were raised or if your family was more financially conscious. My parents were very frugal and I find myself falling into some of their patterns. I find ways to remind myself that my finances are my own to spend. Get a financial planning tool that charts your expenses and cash flow. Staring at a positive net worth can help reassure you.
I use personal capital. Here’s my referral code if interested: https://pcap.rocks/thanh1
Rising Star
To add, I have approx. $70K in savings so I'm doing fine, but I can't seem to enjoy things. The stress is overwhelming.
Not stressed, but conscientious. I always used to do wait and save on Lyfts for example.
I think the difference is to sometimes be okay with spending a little more. I like to splurge on gifts for example (and by splurge, I mean I might spend $300 instead of $100) because I enjoy it.
I started approaching savings differently and it helped me. Decide how much you want to save and put that into savings / investments immediately after getting your paycheck. Everything else is for spending - doesn't matter if you spend it this week, this month, or this year - it sits in a checking account losing value to inflation so you're better off spending it
Remember...rich people live like they are poor and poor purple life like they are rich
Rising Star
Having a lot of money but choosing to live frugally is not the same as living frugally because you don't have a lot of money
I'm similar...not stressed, but very considerate of what I buy and minimize costs a much as I can. I grew up poor and money always equaled freedom for me. I'm glad I have this mindset - it's allowed me to save without budgeting (I have no urge to buy most things I don't need), live without debt and still have the lifestyle I want.
On the other hand, I know the things that I value and am willing to spend on (for me that's health, travel, gifts for others, good, food/drink) and I think that will be important for you to figure out if you haven't already. Also, consider this in relationships. My partner of 15 yrs has a different viewpoint and spends a lot more on "stuff" - not my place to tell him how to live. We just keep separate accounts so we can both do what we want with our money without any judgment/resentment.
I used to be like then, but then I got divorced and lost it all :). Now I’m living it up!
My parents were pretty frugal their whole lives. Then one got really sick and they never did much with their considerable savings in the bank.
Have to wonder how they could have used that money to destress their 40s and 50s.
Being extraordinarily frugal is as as bad as being extraordinarily spendthrift.
I feel the same - life is so expensive and I don’t have a safety net. I feel like so many people can live life more carefree because if their bank goes to $0 they just move back home for a few months and stack cash, which I can’t do.
It’s really stressful to need be your own safety net. Even harder when you look around and see a bunch of folks who have so much support.
Used to be that way. Then got rich..and stopped caring
Serious question: when did the cutoff happen? I'm cheap af rn and I wonder if I'll ever grow out of it lol
This is how i used to be just a year ago. very frugal with my money and wanted to save in every way i can...even would walk to places rather than spend 2-3 bucks on a metro/bus. While this can be good in valuing money and saving up, i finally realized after years that this can also lead to negative traits. As for all, moderation is the best method. Don’t be excessive, but don’t be stingy. You’ll find more happiness and stress less when you stop worrying about those little bucks here and there, which in the long run really won’t matter that much.
You mean income of 80k CAD not USD ?
Ah - consultant is both a general classification and a specific title. Got it!
I do/did. But for me it is because I don't come from a stable income household so I saw my mom save every single penny whenever she could. And I mean that. Walk instead of bus kinda save. So that stayed with me. It takes a lot of unlearning to tell yourself that you're not in that situation anymore. That you have enough saved up for a rainy day and you're talented so you will end up on your feet one way or the other. And the second thing would be to make saving goals or expenses goals -whatever works for you. If you have picked that figure in your head and stick to it, it feels a lot more in control.
I save 85% and stressed too
Long run this behavior is toxic, short run it’s teach you super valuable lessons. FWIW, I felt the same way as you until I started creating a budget, because that gave me permission to spend money.