Related Posts
Conversation Starter
Need 11 likes to enable DM
Bowl Leader
These are my favorite clients by far.
Bowl Leader
Additional Posts in Introverted Consultants
I have a love-hate relationship with DU.
Pro
I agree wholeheartedly:
New to Fishbowl?
Download the Fishbowl app to
unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.
unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.
A few things I’ve done that help me out, I sit at one of the ends of the table, not the head, the corner seat - reduces your interaction zone. Other than that, I generally don’t talk too much, most of it is questions or inquiries that get the other person(s) talking, usually that prompts the conversation to take off, I then nod, generally acknowledge or ask another question - let’s me enjoy my food and keeps me out of meat of the discussion. It’s really not all that bad...
I literally think about team dinners the way I think about running a workshop. I have to be on, caffeinated, louder than I think is necessary and smiley to the point of wanting to punch myself in the face. I try to do them on Fridays so I have the weekend to decompress or I go in late the next day. You need recovery time
Friday team dinners: 🙅🏻♀️
Team Dinner - the two words I dread.
I don’t go to all team dinners - who says they are “mandatory”? We are all adults.
And when I do go, often find a way to leave early (after appetizers).
When I choose to stay for the entire event, my choice of seats is as described above - on the end, and hopefully sitting next to someone who will happily talk about themselves so long as I ask an occasional question and nod
M1 - I hope you meant you do workshops/dinner on Thursday in order to decompress on Friday!
If you meant team dinner on Friday, that’s cruel and unusual punishment 😱. I never attend any firm related event on a Friday night , Saturday or Sunday. That’s my time
I have to balance this b/c of not coming off as not wanting to socialize with the team. I find that if I plan it, I feel more in control of the environment. I pick low key quiet spots and an earlier time. And I’ll grab the bill as soon as socially acceptable and say that I’m headed back to hotel if anyone wants to come with or feel free to stay and socialize.
AGREED
We never have a team dinner that goes less than 3 hours and after every dinner I feel incredibly close to burn out and my work suffers the next day. I realize this is a “me” problem and really not normal. I want to commit less to team dinners but we’ve been explicitly told they are “basically mandatory unless an emergency comes up” and the team will ridicule absent team members so there is definitely a stigma involved with skipping. I’ve been faking it this whole time but it’s gotten to where I don’t think I can anymore.
I have a really good relationship with my manager but she’s a bleeding heart extrovert and one of the people who ridicules others for skipping dinner. Id like to have a conversation with her but I’m worried she won’t understand and it will only sour our relationship. In that case, I really do feel like my only option is to change teams or change jobs. Any advice for approaching this situation?
If you gain enough respect, missing out won’t mean anything to anyone