I think one of the partners is flirting with me or maybe I’m delusional and he’s just being really nice. How can I tell?

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Maybe this is just me, but I don’t think I’d even try to inquire into the motive. I’d just shut it down gently and try to return us to more professional discussion. Eg “kind of you to say. Returning to the motion…”

likesmart

A5 be jealous

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What type of stuff is he doing or saying? I had a partner call me out of the blue once and tell me I had a great smile. I think after a while he got offended that I wasn't complimenting him back and started treating me differently, getting angry a lot, being more domineering, etc. He flirts pretty openly with some women in the office, so he may just see it as normal. Hate navigating the politics of this job.

likehelpful

Weird. I was responding to the poster's response, but it seems to have been deleted.

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I would NOT trust your instincts on this one given you mentioned somewhere in the replies you have a crush on him.

Even if you’d never get involved with a married guy, you still want him to be flirting with you. So there’s at least some confirmation bias there. Even if he is, it’s possible you subconsciously “started it” so to speak.

I would just focus on keeping things professional on my end. What if you don’t realize everyone in the room thinks you’re the one flirting with him?

likesmarthelpful

Omg this is the comment I needed. 😭 I would die of embarrassment if people thought I was the one flirting with him and he wasn’t actually flirting back. Confirmation bias is so real. This is the ick I needed to get out of this crush lmao. Thank you 🙏

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I'm late getting here and I am so glad this is your update, because that could have ended in a serious disaster!

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I work in L&E so what if other employees think you are getting special treatment because of this behavior? I just see the potential liability in all this. I would ignore it and just be professional and civil and just do your job. It may or may not be anything but look out for your professional reputation.

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Are you 35 and older?

I think the premise is the opposite. If you're under 35 you're more likely to think it's flirting and you'd be offended by it, if you're over 35 you're less likely to think its flirting and you'd be flattered by it. Someone correct me if I'm wrong.

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