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Just be yourself and be proud of who you are (all of you). Let the haters hate and don’t be afraid of what other people think or of what could go wrong. At the end of the day, why spend the precious little time we have on this earth trying to conform to other people’s narrow, and often misinformed, views?
Trust me, it’s not worth it 🤷🏽♂️ also, either you are a POC or you are not. It’s hard to trust people that play sides during a time like this. Code switching is one thing, but downplaying a whole race you are a part of just to fit in with another is not the move.
At the end of the day, you are not playing “the inside game” or “the outiside game”…you’re just playing yourself. You should want to win at the game of life by being yourself rather than pretending to be something you are not. Assuming all of your close friends are not white or “white passing”, what would doing something like that say to them?
Admittedly, I am not white passing and have experienced a fair amount of racism throughout my life, but I’d rather deal with that head on with honesty, pride and integrity, than try to “fit in” with the very race that is oppressing me. My spouse is white and when we have children of our own one day they will be raised with this in mind.
Just my two cents 😊
If the goal is to raise other people with you, you might get further using all your tools to get to the top then promoting those you actually align with. Lower risk lower reward than trying to shift people's mindsets but then again there's room for both.
Don’t comply. Existence is resistance, even as it’s unfair that POC have to have our existence politicized at all. I almost think that the privilege to walk through this world and be white-passing requires solidarity with your POC counterparts, as they won’t have the same extent of safety that you do, for as long as these inequities persist in our society. Whether or not you choose to benefit yourself by hiding ?? the poc side is ofc ultimately up to you, but. Just something to consider.
Exactly…
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Anyway, due to the recent administration, my parents are telling me to start identifying as white and not tell others about my background, not to join any affinity bar associations, to remove family photos from my office, etc. They say it's to protect myself, but I feel like I'm just putting on a mask now. Want to know what others think. Thanks!
Oh aren’t your fortunate! You can hide your ethnicity when times get tough, wow - milk it. Just curious - did you do the same when you applied to college and law school?
That’s the opposite of passing 😆
If you feel like your firm is a safe space, then I think it’s even more important to get involved with affinity groups and stand beside your fellow POC. Now is not the time to hide away in the shadows. This administration is literally chipping away at the rule of law and setting up an authoritarian regime. They’re coming for all of us.
Fellow white passing POC (until people see my full name at least): I think there's value in playing it both ways. You can support fellow affinity members playing the inside game or the outside game, just like in politics, and I think it's up to you to decide which is best for you.
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Same. My name is bit uncommon that if folks closely scrutinized, they figure out I'm not white. Otherwise, most think that I'm just white with an uncommon name and that my parents were hippies.
Being that I can't pass I double down on my blackness, but I don't know what I would do in your case. I can't begrudge wanting to get your money in peace and not having to deal with the extra stress of racism.
I’m white passing and LGBTQ+. You have to decide what is right for you. BigLaw has internally at least been pretty progressive on these issues, but we are in a different time. Are you economically vulnerable, such that a three month job loss would gut you? Or if you have some stability, would you be upset if you made partner having hidden yourself from your colleagues and clients?
I decided that I didn’t want to work at or be a partner at any firm that wouldn’t promote me with a photo of my partner in my office. So I was out during OCI etc with everything. But I also have been an obsessive saver since my junior associate years to give myself maximum flexibility.
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Yeah, firms used to be alright. But, now, with this recent administration, things are scary. I'm lucky I can pass as white. But, I don't want to lie to myself and betray others. I wouldnt be comfortable having to hide who I am.
It’s 2025. Nobody cares. You gotta stop putting mental obstacles in front of yourself.
There is nothing wrong with have two identities. You can be one version of yourself at work and be another more fulfilling honest version who leans into identity and culture outside of work.
I think if one has to go so far as to take down wholesome family photos in the office so colleagues don’t know you are not 100% white is very problematic 🤣🤣