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Any work or use to work at Chartwells K12
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If you propose a number and it works for you and the potential employer agrees, that's great, and there's nothing wrong with it. It usually doesn't work that way, however. If someone has to do some negotiating it's almost always advantageous to have the other party propose a number. And the potential employer, knowing their own pay bands, should be able to do that. And it's better to get it done early on, so people don't waste time on a scenario that can't work.
I tried to take all of those pithy sayings with a grain of salt. It's a nice idea, but not a practical reality. If you get a good number that you want to work for, go for it.
It’s a loss if they would have offered 25% more.
Clearly it’s just a rule of thumb though.
I always ask for 10% more than I want
In a reasonable discussion between sincere parties working towards a mutually functional resolution the OP is absolutely correct.
The problem is that in salary negotiations, both parties are not both trying to find the best mutual solution, the employer is always aggressively working to extricate the most value from the worker for the absolute lowest possible compensation. So in that insincere game, whoever blinks first generally loses.