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Remember to breathe, and wear a smile. Then, plunge in. The more practice you get, the less nervous you're likely to feel.
The main thing isn't how you feel, it's not letting those feelings get in the way of speaking/participating.
I have big balls
I get nervous just doing a round robin where everyone just says their name and what they do. Like holy shit brain, do you think I’m going to forget my name and what I do?!? All of a sudden I’ll forget I’m a small Asian woman and mistakenly tell everyone I’m Sean and I do construction?!?
It happens every damn time. I’m almost 40. By at this point I make fun of it, “ooh, I almost forgot what we’re doing here...” or “hello my name is ... and I’m an... oops not that kind of meeting.” Laugh it off. It happens to be everyone. Don’t hold yourself to such a rigid or high standard. It’s ok to be nervous. Own it
Practice in low stakes settings ... especially ones that make you nervous at first but when you think about it really don’t mean anything , eg meetings with junior clients, internal things, etc
Just finally realize that you’re smarter than most of the people in the room
Listen to music or do something that relax you. Take a big breath and speak as if you were chatting with someone over drinks. You got this OP.
Alcohol helps
Just know the material. It will come to you once you open your mouth. It is ok to have false confidence, especial on shorter engagements.
Have an inner checklist:
1. Breath
2. If possible, validate your point with your neighbor (“I would say xyz. Do you feel the same?”)
3. Check the facts: is my statement valid? Am I prepared for counter questions?
4. Is there anyone in the room giving me confidence? (Could even be a nice, open and encouraging smile)
5. Ask yourself: what is the worst thing that could happen? Do I still remember what someone said a couple of weeks ago? It takes the pressure of embarrassment out of your thoughts.
6. Take a sip for water to clear your throat.
7. Now: Say it out loud. It won’t hurt!
👍
I’ve learned by just going for it. Have said stupid things from time to time and I lived! What got me to throw caution to the wind was the abundance of times I sat there thinking I should say XYZ, and then seeing the group actually arrive at XYZ conclusion and give a lot of props to the person who first said it.