{ "_id": "5dd48b57399146001ac7350b", "_isBlocked": false, "creationDate": "2019-11-20T00:39:51.491Z", "categories": [], "description": "How do you make it work?", "relatedCrowdIds": [ "552d1d24dc1c586b09d2d052" ], "fishIconColor": "00fff5", "hideNumberOfUsers": false, "iconUrl": "https://dslntlv9vhjr4.cloudfront.net/crowd_images/uyCXW0QB3EbQg.png", "rectangleIconUrl": "", "isLocked": false, "isCommentsEnabled": false, "isPublic": false, "handleUrl": "working-parent-in-biglaw", "isVisible": true, "name": "Working Parents in Law", "networkingEnabled": false, "numberOfNetworkingUsers": 14, "numberOfUsers": 1138, "feedState": { "countOfMessages": 50, "countOfUserMessages": 50, "countOfSystemMessages": 0, "lastMessage": "Recently had to disclose to an equity partner that juggling caseload with caring for a sick partner and resulting de facto solo parenting has been hard. Response was totally supportive but she did ask to alert managing partner, and I said OK. In line for a partner track promotion in next few months, did I make a mistake sharing this, like I can't be trusted to manage accounts on my own and now promotion, badly needed on one income, is in jeopardy?", "lastSign": "Associate", "lastUpdateDate": "2022-09-14T19:25:39.356Z", "lastMessageDate": "2022-09-14T19:25:39.356Z" }, "priority": 0, "type": 2, "creatorId": "5dd4057c4ea3a500227c2042", "bowlType": "58e6c29670558a0016aae90f", "bowlTypeName": "Diversity Groups", "background": { "from": "4622D2", "to": "0F71A6" }, "divisions": [], "numberOfFollowers": 20, "promptsDisabled": true, "roomEnabled": false, "regions": [ "61891c8e2ca26eaffdf8d90f" ], "requestToJoinSettings": { "isJoinReasonRequired": false, "shouldRequestPhoto": false, "isMultipleChoiceEnabled": false }, "bowlTypes": [ { "bowlTypeId": "58e6c29670558a0016aae90f", "bowlTypeName": "Diversity Groups" } ], "suggestedIndustry": { "_id": "552d1d24dc1c586b09d2d052", "name": "Law", "iconUrl": "https://dslntlv9vhjr4.cloudfront.net/crowd_images/Pioh6bzlrjjeI.png", "crowdIconUrl": "https://dslntlv9vhjr4.cloudfront.net/crowd_images/WuoHhDiJApHMU.png" }, "noIndex": false, "lastView": "" }

Recently had to disclose to an equity partner that juggling caseload with caring for a sick partner and resulting de facto solo parenting has been hard. Response was totally supportive but she did as… more

Is anyone willing to share if your firm offers egg freezing without a fertility diagnosis as a benefit? We are trying to expand our benefits and would love to be able to say that others in the indust… more

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Sometime I feel like I'm operating at lower capacity than during the height of Covid trying to navigate billables and no childcare/remote school. Anyone else feel this way? Are we just burnt out… more

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Had a second baby almost a year ago now and just can’t get back into work mode. I used to be a workaholic and now can’t find any motivation in my current job. Most of it is probably sleep deprivation … more

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Has anyone taken on side gigs here? In transactional real estate and could really use the extra money. I’m in-house and drowning in bills. Where did you post and what kind of insurance did you get?

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Do you pay out of pocket on insurance premiums at your firm? My wife may leave her job to stay home and we’re on her insurance. My firm told me we’re $750/pay period or $18k/yr. that sounds absurd.

likehelpful

How do you manage the constant school cancellations? Do I need a nanny in addition to daycare?

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What are your best (or worst) kids interrupting a zoom depo or hearing stories during the pandemic?

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My two young toddlers are home from daycare for the next 1.5 weeks for the holidays, and I have off work to watch them. It’s only been 2 days, and I’m so exhausted that I’m counting down the days unt… more

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Curious to know what the norm is — does your firm prorate your bonus for time that you are out on paid parental leave?

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Going back to work next month. Have a full time nanny but feel like even that isnt enough. I work all sorts of timezones. Europe has my morning, Asia has my evening. Nanny 9-5? 7-3? 10-6? No clue what… more

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Since this is an open forum where we can be honest, I've assembled a list of billable litigation tasks that can be done from a playground: Conference calls, File review, Fly on the wall depositi… more

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Fourth-year associate. I will soon be commuting to Midtown Manhattan to a firm that pays market. From a financial perspective, am I completely nuts to be driving in and parking? Between tolls and park… more

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Today is my first day back at work (and first full day back in my physical office) after a few weeks off for parental leave. Needless to say, I am struggling to stay focused on anything other than wan… more

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Insurance Defense Associate new to group. Just finished first year on the defense side after 6 years on the Plaintiff side, joined 3 weeks before lockdown. WFH with 6 and 2 year old. While billing … more

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What % of net income do folks spend on private school tuition for their child(ren), if any? My oldest will be starting kindergarten in the fall and her sibling in 2 years. Cost to send both will be ap… more

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Dyslexia! After having our kindergartener son tested (privately) related to ADHD, we were told he may have dyslexia too (which would explain why he struggles so much with phonics but is amazing at sig… more

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My spouse has made it clear to me that they no longer support me working in biglaw and want me to find a job with more reasonable hours. They were supportive early in my career and when we had one chi… more

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My wife often calls me by 5:45/6 to ask where I am if I’m not headed home yet. Sometimes she’s stressed with kids/dogs/dinner and really wants me home. This really throws off my concentration because … more

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My wife and I are planning on having kids soon. I’m building a new practice at a new firm. Any advice on juggling both and setting up boundaries? Do I take a week/weeks off when baby is born and just … more

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NDAs for Nannies? I was wondering how everyone who is doing some work from home during covid handles in-house caregivers? Obviously we all take all steps to protect confidential information and real… more

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I just attended a virtual back to school night. The teachers were clearly uncomfortable with technology (i.e. zoom), admitted that they had only used Google classroom for the last eight days (at most)… more

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I just wanted to take a quick moment to say that you are all doing a great job with this ridiculous, unprecedented juggling act of trying to be a parent, teacher, lawyer and human. Hang in there!

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My wife and I are both terrible housekeepers and our clutter is overwhelming us. We have two kids under 3 and a wonderful nanny but we need more help at home. How do we throw money at this problem? Wh… more

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Where would you begin w/ setting up your own solo practice? I am a military veteran and in need of some serious help (w/ starting a business that is). It is a long story, of which I might reveal more … more

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Have been hunting desperately for childcare bc spouse and I are both FT lawyers trying to handle 4 immunocompromised elementary age kids at home but have been striking out. Have even been considering … more

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I’m a 30 year old insurance litigation defense attorney pregnant for the first time. Feeling like my career is over since my entire worth appears to be dependent on my billing. Words of advice?

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How are people managing WFH with their kids? We have a 2 year old and 5 year old and my partner is also wfh. Small condo, no nanny. It’s freaking insane and my husband and I are fighting every day....

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I was planning on trying to start a family this month, but I just landed an associate position at a prestigious firm I’ve wanted for years. I don’t want to postpone having kids - (cont below)

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For those who are married to a working professional and have young children, what do you do to keep your marriage strong? (Cont below)

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(Especially those of you with young children) how do you make time to exercise/be active?

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Anybody get divorced as a young-ish associate with little kids? I think I'm on that path and really struggling

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Should I stay or should I go? Hoping to get some insight from those that went before me. I am a 6th year call working at a top20 firm in private M&A. Two kids and am in the position (continued bel… more

How many Big Law partners sacrificed their marriage to become partner, and, if you didn’t, how did you pull it off. Almost every partner I have ever worked for has been divorced at least once....

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I work as of counsel at a small firm directly with 1 other attorney. I have worked w/ the other attorney for the last 10 years. How much paid maternity leave is reasonable to request?

Biglaw single parents? I’m a recently single parent. My ex is (almost) completely out of the picture now. Any other biglaw single parents with tips or tricks to making this work on my own?

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Biglaw parents, where do you choose to live and why? Somewhere close to work to avoid commute and spend more time with kids? Suburbs?

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I’m having trouble transitioning from work to home. What do you guys do to get yourself in the “home” mind so you can be fully present for your kids? What are your transition routines?

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