Anyone ever have success with requesting AA to transfer a spouse’s separate reservation to your reservation so SO can reap elite status benefit (ie, early boarding/seat selection)?

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I believe you need to call and link the reservations. If you’re EP then you can choose to stay together or split if you get upgraded but your SO doesn’t. If you don’t split then it goes to the next person on the upgrade list.

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They won’t transfer reservations, but they will link them (you’ll both still have separate record locators), but your SO will be with you on upgrade list (up to 24 hours in advance... then it gets complicated)

They can board with you regardless - just tell the gate agent when you scan to board that they are with you. Never had an issue, be it with SO, friend, etc.

They may not be able to chose their own seat, but when you call to link, you can ask the phone agent to sit them next to you in MCE

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