Do you ever think of trashing your entire career and starting over in an industry that exercises your weakest skill set?

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Well I did tech and it created a critical mindset of being overly analytical and masculine, and I noticed people who talk to others have an easier time with life. Also I’m wasting life constantly around men and workhorsed by them while they lead. I was thinking about art stuff because I’ve lost my creativity from being so traumatized from working around competitive men all the time. I want to be good at a different skill. One that would help me cultivate a positive mindset. Inherently searching code or architecture for tiny details that are wrong has made me critical and burdened my nervous system a lot.

likehelpful

It sounds like you don’t have a creative outlet to balance out that critical mindset. A hobby or unstructured play might help.

Now when I say creative, I’m not just talking arts, drama, baking beautiful things. Sometimes that could be just spending time in nature without tech, gardening, hiking, walking, etc.

Now for the critical mindset / workhorse stuff. Maybe it’s time to tap into that masculine side to say “no” and not feel the guilt. And by “no”, I mean boundaries, deciding which way your career goes by the work you take on, etc. not advocating for “lazy girl job” but more strategic in what you allow in your workflow and the other stuff gets delegated to others.

helpful

I dreamt of being an Insta-famous tradwife for a good 30 seconds the other day. Cook everything from scratch in a pretty dress for the likes. Otherwise, no.

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I could but I really don’t want to be a maid or a cook.

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Cooking is so difficult for me but I am willing to learn so I can nest for myself. I don’t enjoy eating out so much and it looks like my body isn’t happy with my outside eating either

No, I would never want to work doing some that was a weakness. I'd rather play to my strengths. However, I dream of leaving corporate life to do my hobby for a living.

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No. You should do what you're good at.

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The idea that a technical mindset is “masculine” is problematic, to say the least.

Also, have you considered learning new skills through classes, on the side, or even within your role before completely changing careers and trying to learn them while doing something brand new? Starting over in an area you know you aren’t well-equipped for, specifically BECAUSE you aren’t well equipped for it, sounds like a recipe for disaster. If you want to pivot careers, do it - but perhaps in a more controlled, steady way.

Or get a hobby that lets you be artsy and creative.

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I mean it is masculine in the Dao sense—that’s not something I’m coming up with. Not to be conflated with male and female. I think I have a skill I just wonder how to cultivate a network around it 🤔

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Lazy girl job sounds great! The key Is finding the pay or comparable work life balance.

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I know what you mean, and I’m exactly in the process of doing this. I have been working in transformation for 8 years, and feel unfulfilled and working almost always in men only teams. I have decided to plan a career change, and become a qualified therapist. To your point, it’s not playing to my weakest skill set, just to skills I don’t get to use much in the corporate world, but that make me feel purpose and fulfilment - empathetic listening, creativity, building authentic social connections.

I am minimising the risk that comes with changing careers in my 30s by following a gradual process - I am qualifying in my own time, doing part time courses over 3-4 years. I am keeping my corporate job in the meantime to make sure I am financially sufficient, and I will probably look to go part time / apply for a less intense corporate job about half way my counselling training. The plan is to fully transition to my new career by the time I am 35, while minimising financial risk.

It’s probably the most challenging thing I have every attempted, but I know it will be worth it if I get to work in a job I love and allows me to sustain myself.

Good luck, fortes fortuna adiuvat 🙏🏻❤️

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No I personally don’t like things that are hard to me. Why do you think about this?

Weakest skill set, no… but one of my favorite hobbies I can say I’m pretty good at, yes!

No. I like to focus on what I enjoy doing. And usually that isn’t stuff I’m 💩at!!!

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With the global economic situation as is, is it worth the risk to change to a job I know i'd like more with less pay, and potentially less job security?

T.I.A.

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