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Quantum meruit! Res judicata! Mea culpa! Wait, what?

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While advocating that sexual preference, gender identity, & physical attraction is something we’re born with, I (straight cis woman) said “if it was really a choice, do you think I would choose to like men.. I wish I was attracted to women.” I was educated that wishing I was something that gets people killed is not the correct way to advocate for equality. I felt horrible but was fortunate to be educated and by someone who knew I meant no harm. It was a terrific learning experience.
I have a girl friend who’s having issues with dating. I told her to just forget men and be gay, she can just choose to like women since we’re pieces of art and easy to love. Key word “choose” 💀. Immediately I took it back, of course.
I'm sure I've said things in the past that have been offensive. But the one story that comes to mind that I still feel a lot of regret about was a by stander instance years ago.
During a meeting, a white woman on my team made a subtlety racist comment or micro aggression to a Korean man also on my team. He was the only person of Asian decent in the meeting - we were reviewing a product with Chinese writing on it and she asked him to translate the product in a teasing way.
It was pretty awkward for everyone to witness and I wish I would have corrected her in front of the team but I didn't.