How do you deal with a challenger type of personality? I’m fairly new and I know the senior is trying to teach me the thought process. But she also makes me feel extremely small by the way she phrases her questions. I’m already stressed out not having everything figured out yet and this makes me feel super tense and down.

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Best thing I can tell you that is not always easy to practice, but is true 99% of the time regardless -

Most things aren’t personal in this job. If someone is being a jerk to you, it’s very likely not because they hate you. It’s because they just got yelled at by 50 other people, and they’re taking it out on you, or just stressed and can’t control it. Or maybe they’re just anxious and not realizing how it’s coming across.

It’s true in so many cases. It’s true when someone seems mean. True when someone ignores you. True when someone is trying to undermine you or steal your credit (which you should push back against, but regardless - it’s rarely personal).

I find that once I can separate myself from the situation, I can handle it better because I don’t approach it as “X hates me” or “X is plotting against me” or “X doesn’t respect me,” but more as “X is acting off and here’s what I can do to get them to chill.”

In your case, act professional, be polite. Don’t try to immediately challenge back. If you understand something, just understand it and do good work, and this type of person will come around. Don’t bite the bait of getting into hypothetical “but what ifs” just to have a “challenging” fight. Also give it a little time for this person to get used to you and figure out your weak and strong spots.

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Thank you! This is really helpful

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