How important is it to go to the office/firm Christmas party?
I started a couple of months ago and I really don't want to. I feel awkward, just not my thing. Is this super frowned upon?

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I most regrettably have family in town and will not be able to make it. At least that is the excuse I use.

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Why not go? You might learn a few things about your firm’s dynamics. It could be painfully lame, or it could be fun and refreshing. When people stop showing up, leadership stops trying, and those morale-boosting resources get invested elsewhere, usually not toward morale. Go. Eat for free. Watch your coworkers get sloppy and loose-lipped. Maybe there will be games or a few gift cards.

Worst case scenario: you waste an hour or two and know not to go next year. Best case scenario: you find your work bestie, receive an unexpected gift, and actually have fun. You will never know if you do not go.

I go to company events, very begrudgingly, and remain a quiet observer. You do not have to be the life of the party. Also, someone put real effort into making that party happen. It probably was not because they love company parties, but because they wanted people to feel appreciated and included.

Also, if you do not love attending but enjoy planning events, you might connect with the right people and find a way to contribute to future events in a way that feels meaningful, encouraging, enticing, inclusive and exciting to you.

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It really depends on the individual firm & how everyone vibes together.

At my firm I try to make the event fun for everyone; e.g. this year I rented out a suite at a Lakers game with catering for my staff and some of the colleagues we have in the industry and got us all a sprinter bus to go and come back. Everyone had a great time and it was way better than renting out some private room at a restaurant.

Even though everyone had a great time, I wouldn’t hold it against my staff if they didn’t want to come. Some people prefer to leave work at work, during working hours, and that’s completely fine and fair. If your firm holds you not going against you, I’d suggest finding another firm.

I worked at my firm 6 years and never attended holiday party. Agree with A1, it depends on vibe. I used to go to holiday parties at my old firm because people are very connected. Now I feel the parties are for attorneys only.

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Agree that it's got a lot to do with the firm. Size is also a factor. At a small firm, it's going to be obvious and might make things awkward. If it's a huge party, your absence will probably go unnoticed by most.

Nah, if you just started a few months ago then for all they know you already had plans. If anyone asks just say you already have long standing plans and you’re excited to go to next year’s.

I work for a small firm I have been there 22 years. I only missed one other xmas dinner yet my boss was upset that I didn’t go. I was sick with a ear infection and sinus infection.

Huge firm: who cares? Small firm: depends on the vibe. I like going to ours because I'm fully remote and it helps people remain congenial towards me/feel I'm part of the team.

Did you go??

Nope, I didn’t! And literally no one cared haha. However, I’m not too surprised! It’s a gov’t role and so I’m a small fish in a big pond. I think that has a lot to do with the lack of caring on their part lol.

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