How to become secure of oneself? I feel like I am constantly looking for validation from my bosses as well as my juniors and it's really nerve-wracking!!

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And now you asked the bowl!

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This is both comforting and disconcerting to see a manager say. I can get to manager with this insecurity, but I’ll still be insecure when I get there 😪

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The truth is, nearly EVERYONE struggles with insecurities. Honestly most fake it until they make it.

Most often insecurity like you’re describing comes from a lack of experience in a role/situation. Because of that you can’t identify what “good” even looks like, so you’re constantly searching for that definition - and because giving effective feedback is both harder than it seems and time consuming many supervisors don’t define it well.

Obviously everyone’s different, but just trying to help I’d say start with defining for yourself what “good” looks like for what causes you the insecurity. Take a methodical approach. Once you have a North Star you can build yourself a plan for getting there.

Keep in mind that, honestly, feelings of nervousness and doubt not only don’t go away, but I guarantee you everyone from your Analyst to Julie feels then all the time.

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Love and accept yourself. Do esteemable things. Set boundaries. Get therapy. Explore spituality. Get off social media. Get into nature. Volunteer. Find things that bring you true joy. Meditate. Surround yourself with similar people. Focus on your core values and reduce gaps where you are behaving differently. Learn to be gentle with yourself. Practice compassion toward yourself and others. Trade in the currency of kindness. Focus more on what you are giving back than what you have in terms of things and price tags.

Maybe seeing a professional will give you some insight as to what’s causing you to feel this way.

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