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Tux budget NYC?
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yes. he has changed, not you guys. continue to do the right thing and what you would do for any wedding you’re invited to. it doesn’t have to be overly generous but i would still give a gift
Rising Star
I don’t expect anyone who is in my wedding to get me a gift. Members of the wedding party spend plenty of time and money on a bachelor/bachelorette party, arriving to the wedding a day early for rehearsal, a dress/tux, etc. That’s their gift.
I wouldn’t. That’s me though.
Expensive ring or not, loans exist, people take them out all the time for rings and weddings and if his fiancée is convincing enough, she may have pushed him to buy a ring he can’t afford. How do you know it was expensive though? Lab diamonds and moissanite exist and it’s easy to lie about it being natural because who would even be able to tell?
Aside from that, I don’t think you not buying them a gift is that big of a deal just as I don’t think not receiving one is that big of a deal. Weddings gifts are usually less expected of bridesmaids/groomsmen especially if they spent a lot on events, parties, suit/dress, etc leading up to your wedding. He may have really not been able to afford one. I was in the same boat as a bridesmaid after spending 2.5k on wedding events and what not. I didn’t want to tell my friend money was tight especially on her wedding day lol
I consider wedding gifts as the “price” of attending a wedding. At this point, Ive gone to dozens more weddings than the people I invited to mine. So ofc its a net deficit if I was trying to go 1 for 1.
In other words, give the gift as usual. Him not providing a gift is just bad taste on his part.
The couple shouldn’t expect gifts, because they’ll surely be disappointed. But that doesn’t change the fact that it’s tacky not to give a gift at a wedding. (Unless you’re part of the wedding party and dropped a ton of money on bridal party related things.)
I keep a list of gifts I’ve received for everything and generally give back in kind. If someone is overly generous, so am I. If someone does not give me a gift, I keep my hands in my pocket. Gift giving should feel good, and giving to people where it is one sided, does not feel good. I am also not going to give an extravagant gift and make someone uncomfortable if they gave me a “normal” gift. Perhaps here, I’d send something small, or not attend.
Friendship isnt about winning and losing. If they are good friends I'd hope that did something nice for yall in lieu of a gift. I would strongly suggest you NOT take this into consideration when getting them a wedding gift. If you are wanting to not get them a gift out of spite, then you might want to reconsider if you want to keep these people as your friends. Not saying you would be in the wrong to do so, just that you should genuinely decide if you want to remain friends or not. Dont stay friends with them and play spiteful games.
Exactly my thoughts. Let's just understand their personal circumstances. But of course, it is also important to do things of your own volition.
I “got back” at our friends by being overly generous for their wedding.
If you’re going to attend the wedding, yes. It doesn’t have to be expensive. It can even be a check, just to show support. Some people consider walking in the wedding as they’re gift especially being that they are spending money to be part of your wedding. Some people are also not aware of the fact that they “have” to still give a gift even though they are walking. I would not expect any of my bridesmaids to give me a gift, but if they do, that would be nice.
Of course you do. Don’t be petty.
Yes I would.
I would. I don't want any issues around me. That's only me though.
Hmm. Do what makes you comfortable. Maybe it was really because of financial reasons. We don't really know for sure.
Yes, I would. That will make me feel more at ease. I don't want to start unnecessary drama.
Yes. It doesn't have to be expensive though. Don't dwell too much on the past :)