I feel so overwhelmed by the last 5 weeks. I have lost my mother, my dog, a relationship of 7 months (which I know doesn’t sound like long but has been the longest since breaking it off w my kids father 3 years ago) and I just got in a car accident yesterday. I get counseling, massages and do regular self care….but this feels like too much to handle. I want to thrown myself into work but am worried it will affect my performance and mental health.

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Call your employee support line if you have one I think it’ll help to have someone to talk this all through with as you’re handling grief and so much more

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Sit, breathe! What has to be done today? What can be done tomorrow or the next days?

Perfection is not required. Not folding laundry is ok. Go to dollar tree. 1 basket for clean clothes. 1 basket for dirty. Everyone gets a pair in each room.

Pick one thing that has to be done a day. For me it is dishes. Get the kids involved. Who puts away, who puts in dirty dishes.

Breakfast cereal. (Kids can do)
Lunch PBJ. (Kids can do)
Dinner. You got this! Mac & cheese is a meal for now. We will get veggies another day.

Keep up with therapist. Maybe twice a week if not just once a week.

Find something that you like. Coloring, crocheting, swimming, walking…. Something. Do a little bit each day. Walk for 10/15mins. Mommy time!

Remember sleep is very important. For you and kids. If you’re not sleeping melatonin is huge. Kids can take it too. (Ask kid’s doc to confirm)

Now… look up. See the beauty and wonderfulness in this world! You got this!

Once you are healthy then the relationship will come. Motherhood is hard but the greatest job you will ever have. Learning about yourself and learning to believe in yourself… priceless!

You go woman! Embrace the possibilities!

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I’m so sorry. Maybe instead of throwing yourself into work you could find work adjacent things? Trainings, courses, certifications. Or a LOA on top of that to be able to fully focus on something fresh!

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You've had all the sh*t things happen to you in the space of 5 weeks. 2024 will be a better year for you. One day at a time and it will soon get better - you're doing all the right things.

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Instead of trying to distract yourself with work, pull back and do the grief work. Throwing yourself into work delays the inevitable and your attempts to cover over the hard stuff with work dan result in lower quality work. What can you cut, minimize or pull back on so that you have space to feel and heal?

I’m so sorry that you’ve had such a tough run of bad stuff recently. I’m sorry for the loss of your mom, your relationship and your dog! One of those is very challenging and you are dealing with all of them!

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That was my 2021! Job, dog & mommy! Sending you grace. I also took a year off & just freelanced back into work slowly. During my year off I got back into Pilates & my love of modern dance. Museums & brunches I spoiled myself with self care. Also joined new volunteer groups & found gratitude as well. Sending digital hugs. I would take off three months if you can.

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It’s amazing that you’re apologizing for that not being “a lot” when it seems like pretty much everything hit you at once! (The dog thing, personally, would have pushed me over the edge.)
I LOVE Dog Trainer 1’s tips: take on manageable bits. Throwing yourself into more work doesn’t sound like taking “me” time. If you can swing it, taking even a 40 minute walk first thing in the morning where you listen to a podcast you like is a great way to rightsize the day, get some exercise, and help things feel more manageable. Give yourself grace. And hang in there.

With all that has happened personally, maybe you should consider a leave of absence. If you have a doctor that knows what's happened and you tell them about struggling at work mentally with all the things that have happened, they may put you out on short term disability. You have to consider your mental health wellness and what you need to heal. Good luck and my condolences.

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