I want some advise on how to work for all big4 at the same time

funny
Posting as :
works at
You are currently posting as works at

Forge a DNA test proving you are 50% of whatever race each firm has the least of. When they try to put you on pips just claim racism and threaten lawsuits. By the time they figure it out you'll have gotten rich from yoloing your 4 paychecks on GME calls anyway

likehelpful

Would also claim they are discriminating based upon your sexual preferences. Bam. Done.

Your on the right track and making great life decisions

funny

Secure a job with one, create an LLC, be a sub for three of the others as a SME.

like

*advice. Pls fix.

1. Lie your way to get offers from all big4. At every interview, leverage the lie that you have competing offers from the other 3
2. Commit tax fraud to pay taxes only on your lowest (KPMG) income while you hide the other 3 incomes
3. Under deliver on all your work at all the 4 firms (hey, you got 3 backups)
4. If anyone ever gets on to you, threaten to sabotage the project and their career bad

Related Posts

11 likes to enable DM ! Please help

like

My design organization is looking for guest speakers for our next virtual event! We need design-savvy developers that have experience working with designers. We want to hear your perspectives on the industry and help our design community learn how to better collaborate with web developers.
This volunteer opportunity (with perks) allows for growth, networking, and engaging with the creative community.
Know someone? Are you interested? Post a link to your website, LinkedIn, IG, anything!

Post Photo
like

Is it okay to request to delay the joining date by 2 months?

like

Hi Fishes... I received offer letter from Wipro after a long wait but the joining date is mentioned earlier to my LWD, my LWD is 20th May but the joining date came for 17th May... Whome should I ask to change it...L

Everything's a toy when you're a kitten!

Post Photo
likefunnyuplifting

Now that I got promoted to manager, I’m kind of missing the camaraderie that came along with being out on the floor with everyone else. Is that normal?

like

I've got some friends who work remote jobs, and every day I grow more jealous of them during my one-hour commute.

like

There are many reasons why people in the working world are not direct when speaking. They are one of the following:

* They pretend they are experts
* They are inexperienced
* They are full of themselves
* They don't know what they are looking for
* They love to talk

Even if these people have good intentions, be careful of them. Your time is valuable, and the best thing for you to do is to be direct back at them.

Post Photo
like

Curious, does anyone have perspective to share about CloudGaia? Good, bad, something else, etc?

like

I teach elementary Spanish and we’re celebrating Hispanic heritage month. My 5th graders are researching famous hispanic people. What are appropriate website they can use to do their research?

Does Barclays give joining bonus???

like

Hey all! Need a couple book recs for an upcoming beach trip.

Looking for a great non-fiction, relating to travel or world history (not just one moment in time). Could also be about the marketing world or memoirs of a business leader kinda thing.

Fiction wise I also like fantasy, paranormal, and romance. Some fave book series are the Black Gryphon from Mercedes Lackey, Game of Thrones, and From Jamaica Lane series. Similar books?

like

Attention Ad Students! Go apply to Mobilize, 22squared’s 48 hour ad competition! It’s a really fun opportunity where you get to compete against other teams on a brief, and also have your portfolio reviewed. Apply at

like

So I know this will sound crazy ... but I've never really had to have a portfolio, in the conventional sense, but a current offer is asking for one. What's the best way to build one out? Thanks!

likefunny

Anyone know where to find a reasonably priced 1 bed/studio? Ideally £1,000 - £1,100 a month?

like
like

Can someone refer me in IBM
Years of experience -6.8
Skill - PKI

like

Hello all, i have. A question regarding compensation for a lateral move. I just received a job offer for an UA position from a competing cyber insurance carrier for $70,000 + bonuses. This job will be based out of San Francisco. I currently make $30/hour for the same role in Chicago, after OT it’s about $60,000. Do you think it would be wise to accept the offer? Thoughts in general?

like

Big Law M&A Mid Level (year 4-6) Signing Bonuses. What’s Market these days? I’ve been hearing $50k - $100k, but wanted to see what folks were getting in the last few months.

likefunny

What other performance factors are considered for PDM besides utilization?

like

Additional Posts in Terrible Advice

like

Join the Politics Bowl for mature and well reasoned discussions about the issues of the day.

likefunny

For those of you who faked having children during this WFH period to establish some sort of WLB or whatever other reason… how are you going to spin it when we go back to the office/ client site?

like

Set very low expectations for raises and bonuses this year. START NOW. No firm can beat what the market is paying for talent, so under promise with low expectations. That way people will feel grateful when they get a 2% COLA in a few months.

like

If you’re not competent enough to solve real problems in the organization, create a few minor problems that you can solve and look like a hero.

But you have to ensure the org feels the pain of your decision before promising to fix it. It’s like the three parts of a magic trick: the pledge where you float your idea, the turn where you inflict your idea, and the prestige where you fake a way to fix the mess you made on purpose.

Only works managing up, tho.

likefunny

Make every effort to record the fireworks display tonight.

You’re sure to watch that video regularly. Unlike the last 7 years of fireworks displays you watched live through your smartphone screen.

likefunny

Anyone here memorize their credit card number? What mnemonics do you use to remember it?

Family vacations are a must. The house is so much quieter when my wife takes the kids out of the country.

like

We’re approaching annual review season and it’s very important you put your 2022 goals into the system. Most of you don’t have any goals listed (10.5 months into the year) and they goals mean f*ck all in the evaluation process, but I need you to get your goals documented TODAY.

Put all your money in crypto. It’s done going down.

like

How do I ship my mom in law back? Almost ruining our marriage and loosing the affection for my wife and kids already

like

Post your hatred here. Feel free to include your name level and role and the names of those whom you hate the most at your firm. Pls include why. Incriminating evidence is welcome. This is a safe space and there is literally zero chance your boss or any of your coworkers will find out. Not that many ppl may attention to what is said here.

Read your childrens’ diaries every week. That way you know if you’re not giving them enough privacy.

like

What’s the best way to eat a watermelon?

what should I wear back to office?

How do I retire by next week? Need suggestions. Thank you. ✊ We in this together.

like

Conduct annual performance reviews with your kids and let them know their status in the family is at stake. There’s no feeling in the world that compares to seeing an 8 year old kid on a PIP turn it around and earn an invitation to come back next year.

funnylike

Boss: I need you to stop challenging me on every decision.

Me: I don’t want us to have a confrontational relationship and I think we can agree something needs to change. When you make stupid decisions, that affects my business and it makes me feel like you’re not up to the job. That makes it harder for my team to do our jobs. I think to be an authentic leader I need to be radically candid with you and point our your mistakes. So are you willing to work with me on this?

like

When you know the employee survey results for your business unit will be absolute dog crap, just delay the survey and claim it’s so you can conduct a more focused survey for your business unit.

like

How do I get promoted?

like

New to Fishbowl?

Download the Fishbowl app to
unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.
That was just a preview…
Sign Up to see all discussions
  • Discover what it’s like to work at companies from real professionals
  • Get candid advice from people in your field in a safe space
  • Chat and network with other professionals in your field
Sign up in seconds to unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.

Already a user?
Login here

Share

Embed this post

Copy and paste embed code on your site

Preview

Download the
Fishbowl app

See what’s happening in your industry
from the palm of your hand.

A phone with Fishbowl app

Scan your QR code to download
Fishbowl app on your mobile

Download app

Sign up for free to view this conversation on Fishbowl

By continuing you agree to Terms of Use and Privacy Policy

Already have an account? Log in

Sign up for free to continue using Fishbowl

By continuing you agree to Terms of Use(New) and Privacy Policy(New)
Messaging rates may apply

Already have an account? Log in

For account settings, visit Fishbowl on Desktop Browser or

General

Legal