I’ve watched people sacrifice decades chasing partnership. They missed family milestones, constant stress, even health issues only to get there and realize it wasn’t what they wanted. The money and title are huge, but the trade-offs are brutal. I can’t help wondering if, after investing so much, people feel trapped, like walking away would make all those years of grind meaningless. If you made it all the way to partnership and realized it wasn’t for you, would you walk away, or is the sunk cost too big to ignore?

likehelpful
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Yes, but I don’t have any sunk costs in my view. I wasn’t “chasing partner.” I was doing a job that gave me a life I wanted. Being poor is also constantly stressful. Being in debt is also constantly stressful. People have to miss family milestones in other jobs too. My mom was a single parent working a regular 9-5. She still didn’t get to make our sport events and school plays all the time either. She was tired and often overwhelmed with trying to survive. She couldn’t always afford to travel or take days off when a major milestone was happening. Yes, I’m “on cell,” but I can hop on a flight at the drop of a dime because I don’t physically have to be at a desk to do my job and I have the money. Let me know when you find the job that comes with no sacrifice - time, money, stress, flexibility, or security.

likesmartuplifting

Same re my mom and two kids. Point well reasoned.

Walked away happier, healthier, and by the grace of God, richer through other avenues that were made possible because I left to explore something new.

likeupliftingsmarthelpful

Consulting. I served as fractional in-house counsel or advisor to various companies. I have been paid hourly, salaried, and/or equity. I have also made personal investments. I don’t receive health insurance, but I have that through my spouse. I could also settle down and work full time for one of these clients and do pretty well, but I don’t want to be tied down. In fact, I am conducting due diligence right now on a new business where I would be a silent, but watchful partner.

I've been poor, in massive debt and known the stress of feeling like there's no way out. I've known the toll it took on my mental health and my personal relationships.

And now I know what it's like to be rich, and have to make sacrifices here and there.

Trust me, being rich is WAY better.

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I think you're looking at this wrong. Partnership is the natural path to hard work at a hard firm after a certain number of years. Did you miss some things? Perhaps. But you were able to provide a life for your family that they wouldn't have. Also, you've made partner - a huge accomplishment. You can walk away knowing that. Also, I've heard that some jobs (in house) won't promote you to top legal positions without you making partner at a law firm. Not sure if that still goes, but that's one less hurdle going in house after the partnership.

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Definitely not the case. From what I’ve seen, people who get promoted to top positions in-house have lots of in-house experience at big name companies and/or relationships with people who help them get those jobs.

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I was a partner for 3 years, and burned out badly. Changed firms and took an Of Counsel role. It's wonderfully freeing. I make less, but still really good money, and I work fewer hours and have less responsibility. Glorious.,

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Congratulations. I'm glad you found your place.

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I feel trapped every day and I was just demoted to intern.

That sounds like a toxic situation that you should look to exiting asap. I hope you find something better and take care of yourself.

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