Consultant, which means the only time I get to interact with my (infant) son is at midnight when he shrieks for an hour and I need to sleep so I can get up and work another 12-14 hours

As a consequence, I’m beginning to resent him, which is totally unfair. He’s not intending to have this impact.

How the hell do people do this?

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See if you can adjust your schedule. Take a break at dinner/bedtime (ideally when he’s alert and more fun) and hop back online if needed after he goes down. And start figuring out how to set some boundaries with work.

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I can totally relate OP. It will get better very soon at least for the sleeping part. I would recommend to sleep train him early on: painful at first, but so worth it in long term. My son began to sleep through the night before reaching 6mos.

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Agreed. We sleep trained at 5 months. Best decision ever.

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Your boundaries need to reflect your priorities. It’s possible though it might be uncomfortable if you haven’t practiced this skill before. But do it for the sake of your baby!

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Agree. Had kid when working in industry and when in consulting. You draw the boundary(hours, travel, etc.). Consulting or industry, little babies are tough. They did get me to buy over the ear headphones and play the “peace” playlist. Ha! They get really fun 18-24 mos. and start forming into little humans.

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Baby years are tough... as get older and develop personality you’ll appreciate more. This time goes super fast and won’t get it back so try to catch yourself abs enjoy being in the moment when can.

Longer term look to that pivot or exit for something more manageable.

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I chose to leave consulting. Grass IS greener on the other side…

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This part is rough no matter what. But it’s also short He’ll get used to sleeping through the night as he gets bigger and he can hold more milk in his belly. Our 6mo old is just getting to this point and it’s helping immensly.

Also echo what someone said if you can take a break around dinner and then log back on.

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Haha yeah this is kid #2 for us. That helps too.

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I have a separate bedroom from the wife, baby sleeps with wife

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