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How do you help someone get out of depression?
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It is so hard!! My first (of 3) was a really difficult baby and i had zero tricks to help soothe him.
I did a lot of sitting/bouncing on n a big exercise ball - that motion seemed to help calm him more than being rocked. And a lot off holding and swaying by our microwave exhaust fan for loud white noise.
Do you do much baby wearing? Try to see if you can find a carrier you both like (and it might take a few tries for her to like it, that’s ok. Dont give up after the first couple failed attempts!
I think they just want to be really close to you and the pressure on her belly might help too.
But the lack of sleep and the constant crying is no joke. Try to give yourself a little time every day to get away from it. Even if it’s 15-30 minutes of walking around the block alone.
Hope you find one thing that works! These babies are nuts!
I liked the soft stretchy wraps when they were really tiny. Took a couple tries to get it to feel snug enough - watch some YouTube videos! But seemed like it fit their tiny balled up legs better.
It’s so defeating not being able to soothe her and we’ve tried everything. My husband is looking for a job and I’m so worried about when he goes back to work and trying to manage her all alone with colic :( help.
Your supply might be low. Try increasing with mothers milk, fenugreek (4x a day) and power pumping. I bet baby it’s just hungry.
Did you check that nothing reattached after the tongue tie?
Gotcha. I have 3 kids but none did that. I’m sorry.
Might be hungry. Try topping up after breastfeeding to see if that soothes her. You might need to increase your supply. Are you drinking tons of water and making baby feed on you at least twelve times a day?
I had a similar experience and was seeing a lactation consultant. We also determined that my son had a dairy and soy intolerance so once I cut those from my diet everything got SO much better. Good luck and remember you're doing an amazing job no matter how you feed your baby!!
Can I ask how they determined it? Did they do stool testing? And can I push for this with her pedi? I don’t want to get so far down the road with this, I’m already so bleary eyed and sad she’s so unhappy. Also how hard was it to cut out? I’ve cut dairy before but still used tiny bits of butter etc. it’s probably all or nothing right? Thanks for the insight!
My first was like that.
There were 2 things going on with her. First was acid reflux. She got her first prescription when she was a week old. First Zantac and then Prilosec. The second was that she was one of those rare kids who was intolerant of breast milk. I cut my diet down to basically plain rice and chicken to find out what was bothering her (plan was to add back foods slowly to see what caused the distress) and even then she was in tremendous gastric distress. Much better on Alimentum.
I went through a rough time psychologically because I couldn’t feed my baby, as if I was bad for her. But in the end it’s what was best for all of us because she felt better and we had less stress.
Thanks for the insight! Did they milk allergy test her or you determined it just by your own elimination diet? I don’t think I can hack eliminating things and slowly introducing. We have so much food people have made us that’s somewhat saved my sanity of having no time etc. not to mention my husband has limited time to help so cooking is not an option at the moment. I think If she has an allergy id just immediately switch over to formula, as much as it pains me :( I really want breast feeding to work out and it’s also sending me to a weird place emotionally as well.
A lactation consultant might be able to help. It’s so tough with babies because they can’t tell you what’s wrong. It’s not the most concrete thing to say but here is what has always worked for me —get really quiet and ask yourself “if I did know what the answer was, what would it be?” (This question also works with doctors who aren’t sure or tell you whatever is happening is normal).
You might not get the right answer the first time and you might have to trial and error a few things. Maybe try stop eating dairy yourself and see if that helps. Or try just really basic fodmop and see if that helps. You could try elevating the bassinet on one side so the baby is at an incline (that helped my son so much!) we tried a reflux medication but it gave him hives so elevation was key.
The biggest concern is dehydration if the baby is spitting up a lot. Definitely ask your pediatrician to take a close look.
I also recommend Blueberry in addition to your health coverage. It’s only $12/mo and you get 24 hr access to a doctor. Has saved us multiple times when our pediatrician wouldn’t prescribe a cream we needed or we weren’t sure if we needed to go to the ER. A lot of times it’s cheaper than my copay. Kaiser makes you talk to an advice nurse first and I can get a Dr at Blueberry faster than the nurse at Kaiser.
I don’t get a kickback if you sign up but you get a free medical kit if you use this link: https://app.blueberrypediatrics.com/s/christina5444
Maybe her tongue tie could be bothering her too?
Is anything you’re eating really spicy? I’m just trying to come up with everything I can for you because I really really feel for you.
When we couldn’t calm him down we’d get in the car for a drive or a walk in the stroller.
You got this! xo