Thinking about divorce. Wife had an affair 3 years ago that I haven’t been able to move past. Been married 11 years and have two kids though. Restarting individual and couples therapy before I pull the trigger. Anyone else been in a similar situation? Should I blow up the family if I can’t get beyond this?

Posting as :
works at
You are currently posting as works at

What about this affair bothers you? Was it with someone you knew? Did you find out on your own? Did she lie to you about it?

I found out on my own and she lied about it multiple times until confronted with hard evidence. Honestly, I just can’t get images of them together out of my head.

OP- have you tried individual therapy?
If i May be honest, i also had an affair during a time i was depressed and in a low place, and my SO found it the same way you did. He also couldn’t get past over it and we had a family.
Both child and i had to go to therapy and today i honestly regret it, but i understand why i did it. I had a lot of shit to deal with myself that i didn’t.

Give her a fair chance. For your own sake and your family’s. Just because you do it once, it doesn’t mean you’ll do it again. We all make mistakes.

Related Posts

What would a cmc statistician with 2 years experience with masters degree pay level be at GSK?


Anyone else having issues logging into INSZOOM today? Server seems to be down?!


I’m working with a recruiter trying to lateral to a smaller Midwest market and not really happy with them. They are just sending me general firms that they’ll send my resume to, not actual listings. One of those firms requires my law school transcript but I haven’t sent it yet. Today I just saw a posting on the bar website for a job with that same firm — do I have to go through the recruiter or can I apply myself?


Client talking about a problem: "this is the largest gaping hole I see, it keeps me up at night"

Other client: "hmm… let’s move on"


Any advice for an Editor who is taking the leap from full-time to freelancer? 10 years experience with Post-House's and brands. Based in LA.


Leave KPMG alone 🤣

Post Photo

No hike letters today? For anybody?


I had a one on one work meeting with a partner and I noticed hyperventilation was coming. And I was having trouble breathing. I did talk through what I needed to quickly but then again I said out loud I can't breathe, twice. Partner didn't say anything about it after a brief silence. And proceeded with the meeting. I did get better towards the end of the meeting but..
I don't know what response I was expecting. I just wanted to share this experience where I feel safe to do so here.


When you encounter a conspiracy theorist re the vaccines, do you set them straight or do you just ignore it? I struggle w how to approach this.


Had a steamy dream about my manager last night and now I can't look at him the same.


I've been in advertising for 4 years with no awards. Should I quit?

Could not focus at work the past few days...#crypto


Best windows laptop for b school? Looking for something reliable and fast but won’t break the bank


Has anyone done a Talent Card presentation during their interview at Cisco? Just looking for some tips.


how does anyone actually bill 8.5 hours a day?? Even on my most productive days I can only hit 6, 6.5.


Anyone is working in or knows company called Ephicacy? How is it in terms of Job security, work, processes etc.? Cleared interviews and waiting for offer. Not getting much information on LinkedIn or other platforms..

Does McKinsey, Deloitte has software product teams that are building IP to take to clients , anyone from those here? Interested in exploring new opportunities


How hard is it to get an international rotation in Tax? How long are they? Where are they? What do you do? When can you get them? Etc.


Any recommendations on how to use Lawfully or Trackitt to track I-485 transfers to NBC?


Additional Posts in DWK (Divorced w/ Kids)

If I don’t have kids but I’m divorced. Can I still be part of this bowl?


Has anyone watched Marriage Story?


Has anyone here completed their divorce without lawyers? It’s amicable between both of us and we are agreeing of the separation of assets. Do I still need to get a lawyer or can I do this on my own?

any recommendations for divorce attorney in Chicago/ Naperville/western suburbs?

Thank you for creating this bowl


Only divorce services for uncontested and amicable divorces

Anyone knows how alimony works ? In terms of salary ? How much more than your partner do you need to make, to be granted alimony… I’m asking because I have seen cases where one person sacrifices themselves studying and working hard, while the other person is basically doing the bare min, and they can get alimony if they separate ? In some cases, for life.

How is everybody doing with the lockdown? Dealing with the stress of an ongoing divorce and loneliness is driving me nuts


What was the most surprising thing you have learned throughout the process of your divorce?

Sister going through divorce with verbally abusive spouse, just received temporary judgement for custody of two year old and was awarded joint custody (she was anticipating she’d get sole custody). It’s tearing her apart and I can’t help/live in another state. Anyone have a good recommendation for family lawyers or counselors in/around Phoenix? Any good support groups that could help?

I live in VA, been married for 6 years and have no kids. My spouse and I are just separated and about to get divorced in a month. My spouse left their job a year after we married due to which, I need.

Sadly this is where I ended up (going through divorce with 6mo infant). Abusive spouse wants shared custody when he doesn’t know a thing about taking care of an infant.. any advice would help re custody or divorce as well. We are not in speaking terms

How’s everyone doing? Any struggle this week?

What is the best advice wrt financial settlement ? I was told to simply get a move on and not fight over 5/10k but get on with life ASAP. Do u relate ?

Divorce lawyers in Boston / Worcester?

Has anyone found dating having kids challenging?

Have been married for 15 years and have a kid of 11 years. My spouse is falsely accusing me of domestic abuse and trying to get separated. We have had incompatibility even before marriage on various issues but it was an arranged marriage, we tried to work it out and stay together. Her side is asking her to move on. She has taken my kids passport and kept it with her. What are the options I have to defend myself?

Has anyone experienced your spouse/ex turning your kids against you? My toddler son is aggressive towards me and uses words not normal for toddler vocabulary. MIL also adding fuel to the fire.

How do I know if I am ready for a divorce?


I have 1 one year old and have told my husband that I want to get divorced. He is being immature about the process and is just trying to make everything difficult. Sometimes he says he will move out, then he says the baby and I should, sometimes he says he wants custody when the real reason im leaving is his lack of interest amd resppnsibility toward our family. I can tell he is hurt and is upset that i dont love him anymore and want to get everything ready to make the exit easy. How do I start?

New to Fishbowl?

Download the Fishbowl app to
unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.
That was just a preview…
Sign Up to see all discussions
  • Discover what it’s like to work at companies from real professionals
  • Get candid advice from people in your field in a safe space
  • Chat and network with other professionals in your field
Sign up in seconds to unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.

Already a user?
Login here


Embed this post

Copy and paste embed code on your site


Download the
Fishbowl app

See what’s happening in your industry
from the palm of your hand.

A phone with Fishbowl app

Send download link to your phone


Scan your QR code to download
Fishbowl app on your mobile

By continuing you agree to Terms of Use and Privacy Policy.

Messaging rates may apply

Download app

Sign up for free to view this conversation on Fishbowl

By continuing you agree to Terms of Use and Privacy Policy

Already have an account? Log in

Sign up for free to continue using Fishbowl

By continuing you agree to Terms of Use(New) and Privacy Policy(New)
Messaging rates may apply

Already have an account? Log in

For account settings, visit Fishbowl on Desktop Browser or