Thinking about divorce. Wife had an affair 3 years ago that I haven’t been able to move past. Been married 11 years and have two kids though. Restarting individual and couples therapy before I pull the trigger. Anyone else been in a similar situation? Should I blow up the family if I can’t get beyond this?

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What about this affair bothers you? Was it with someone you knew? Did you find out on your own? Did she lie to you about it?

I found out on my own and she lied about it multiple times until confronted with hard evidence. Honestly, I just can’t get images of them together out of my head.

OP- have you tried individual therapy?
If i May be honest, i also had an affair during a time i was depressed and in a low place, and my SO found it the same way you did. He also couldn’t get past over it and we had a family.
Both child and i had to go to therapy and today i honestly regret it, but i understand why i did it. I had a lot of shit to deal with myself that i didn’t.

Give her a fair chance. For your own sake and your family’s. Just because you do it once, it doesn’t mean you’ll do it again. We all make mistakes.

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