How do I tell my same sex spouse that I want to sleep with the opposite sex? For context, we are not in an open relationship, together 14 years & I’ve always ID’d as lesbian to her.

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You have to be honest with her. It’s not fair to lie to her. Also you need to ask yourself do you want sex or a relationship. That’s not what she signed up for. So you have to be ready for her response which is likely to be hurt. How strong is this desire and what are you willing to do to be sexually fulfilled? But you have to be honest. You’re not helping anyone by keeping this a secret.

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Oh maaan! :/

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Also might be able to simulate the experience... there’s a lot of tech out there, maybe it’s something you and your partner can figure out a way to fulfill that urge within your relationship?

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Are you just curious and want to try it for the first time? Have you done it in the past and miss aspects of it? In any case, your partner will feel a little threatened, but that will happen in any case you want to open up the relationship a bit. Just out the idea out there—“have you ever been curious to have sex with a man?” And see the reaction. (I’m a gay man who has never had sex with a woman, but would try if the occasion came up, just out of curiosity, but I don’t want to be in a relationship with a woman. My partner gets really jealous, and I would never have thought he would be into it, but now we are semi-open. So you can never tell.)

Oh shit. That’s rough. Just be honest

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