I dint feel happy when my bf proposed me for marriage.. i am not able to understand why..he is very nice guy, we have been dating for almost 4 years but honestly, in these 4 years, i never had that butterflies feelings with him never ever. Its just that we are comfortable with each other as a person thats it and we started dating.
Whats wrong with me..i am also not sure if i want marry him..

Hi i lost majority of my money in the stock market. I married and promised my family that I will not make the mistake I made 7 years ago. Gambling. Is this an addiction I have. I keep selling stocks and taking loses buying other stock hoping it will recover but never did and sell again taking loses and buy again. It now sink in to me. I borrow personal loan hoping that the market will do k and I pay it back but I even lost that. I can't stop crying that I hurt the one I love the most my family.

Anyone with anxious attachment tendencies? Going through a breakup and I keep thinking about how I pushed him away and then am down on myself, replaying memories in my mind. At the end of the day, I think we were a bad match from the beginning and misaligned, but so hard not to beat myself over my anxious attachment during my relationship

Any other ladies get so frustrated by forced family set ups? I swear I only hear from my extended family when it’s about set ups and my marriage status. And usually it’s just them praising the guy and telling me to make it work since I’m getting old (early 30s) 🤦🏽‍♀️

ADVICE THREAD

Feel like sharing advice? Which info would have changed your life if you only had known back then?

Any kind of advice is accepted 😉

A friend of mine was arrested last night over a DUI charge and his family is worried sick. How can I help comfort them...

I hate it when people try to bond with me over trauma when their trauma is that they fight a lot with their spouse or they didn’t get the promotion they wanted. How is that staring death in the face??

Hi everyone I am relocating to Hyderabad next month. Even though I look forward to meeting new people I can’t seem to ignore the fact that I will move away from family. My family situation is already complicated, my mom and dad are not on good terms so we don’t live together and when I move it’ll get worse. I am financially independent but I feel guilty for not being there for them. Is there any possibility of getting transferred to Gurgaon office(a lot closer to my home)if I talk to my manager?

Do friends ever dump you onto your therapist or psychiatrist or dismiss your valid, normal feelings as “oh did you tell your doctor about this?” I feel like they’re just shitty friends delegating off.

Trying to set family expectations and would love thoughts on 2 things. 1. How long after baby will I be ready for visitors beyond our parents? I’m thinking a few weeks. 2. Our 3 grandmothers are 1-3 hour flights away (3 diff places) and cannot travel. When will we be ready to take baby to see them? I’m thinking 4-6 months but that would also be flu/RSV season. Can’t predict the future but family is already talking about trips and I want to set expectations and do what is best for baby. TIA!!

For those of you with immediate family members who are at high risk, how are you doing? I find myself being very anxious and stressed about my father getting sick.

I've got some friends who work remote jobs, and every day I grow more jealous of them during my one-hour commute.

I ended my relationship of 6 years about 3 months ago bc he said he might regret not having kids later down the line. we were always on the fence but I’m leaning towards no. It hurts so much having to walk away from an otherwise perfect relationship. Wish this was easier…

Do you think you and your significant other should have similar personalities? My significant other and I are doing long distance and I feel like when I FaceTime with him, I emote more and show interest by asking more questions but from his end, he doesn’t always have a reaction or just nods, and it makes me feel like he’s uninterested. On his end he sees it as he’s comfortable.

Anyone here want to be a friend can ping me..

I’m currently struggling with my friend group. I’m a transplant to my current city and ended up making friends with my coworkers (who were also transplants). Now I’m regretting this as I don’t feel like the friendship is deep and things seem competitive. I feel like I have no friends and my real friends (from HS and College) are in a different state and have their own lives. Any advice on dealing with having no real friends where you live?

My boyfriend just found my vibe...

I used to get 2-3 productive hours after the kids went to bed to catch up on work, chores, shopping, etc but now I'm struggling to have any motivation after the hour-long process of getting kids down.

Been seeing a guy for the past few months. Went to watch a movie on Netflix last night and saw that my ex is in a new series. Talk about mood killer. Now I can’t stop thinking about him 😞
He tends to pop in to my head at least once a month. How can I move past this?

So let’s say if someone’s father / very close relative was very high up in the government of India in Delhi. How does that person go about leveraging his / her relationships, legally, to do something in India? Would you rather do that or stay in the US in consulting?

I work in ERP consulting on the technical side. Wanting to move into product. Would anybody be willing to give my resume a once-over?

Any good stories from 2008-2010?

What’s the biggest point of pain for you Indy’s, that tech or other services hasn’t fixed yet?

Can I start learning DSA using JavaScript to get into product based company from service based ? Or I need to learn other language first like C or Java and then learn DSA in that ? I am working as a Frontend developer so I already have knowledge of JS. Please suggest how to proceed ?

Is our industry as competitive as some say? I see a lot of people saying this and I work with a bunch of hacks (myself included). It felt like a little while ago agencies were begging to hire new talent, and most couldn’t find new people. Is it really that hard to get a job at an agency? Maybe I’m just out of touch being in this career for so long.

Does anyone know the timeline between the assessor interview and the confirmation interview? Had my assessor yesterday and wondering when I might hear if I'm continuing foward.

Nagarro or accenture?

Is there travel often in Deloitte ARA? The job posting says 50% travel but that seems like a lot...

Hello People,

Just wanted some suggestions i have been working as a python developer for the last 3 years
Now I am thinking of switching to a data engineer position I need your suggestions is it good to switch or a python developer It is good to continue or what's your suggestions thanks in advance

For the past 2-3 years, I have obsessively tracked my net worth/income trends/investment performance over time. I checked my trends just now, and OMG I hit the 300k net worth mark right around Christmas. I guess I haven’t looked at my dashboard for a month. This feels so cool. I want to shout it from the roof! I can’t really brag about this to my friends, so I’m sharing here! 🎉 🎉

Looking for a referral! First switch from TCS

Yoe: 3.9

Skillset: python, shell scripting, linux, hadoop ecosystem (hive, yarn, HDFS, solr/kafka, scala, map/reduce, Cloudera manager, oozie) datadog, cymatics, nomad, consul, teamcity, jenkins, Git, ansible, Docker. Rest API's

I think with with skillset, i might fall into DevOps category. But still any challenging role is accepted😎

I received an offer from Optum on the first day of joining of another organization. The offer is much much better than at which I have joined. I am really feeling low. What should I do?

If anyone with 2+ year experience in Oracle is looking for an oracle position at EY. DM me and I can refer you for senior, managers, senior manager positions.

I’m prepping someone’s tax return who I see everyday on tv. It’s kind of cool being privy to a celebrity’s confidential financial information. 😁 I’ve also prepped a famous athlete and actor last week.

Is it possible to transfer from audit 8 months in to FDD considering this market? I feel undervalued and want to contribute more…

I have been in Product Management even before the term Product Management was so prevalent. I have initiated ideas for new products to align with company strategy and goals, designed and managed the development of the products, and enabled delivery of product to the market. Since most of these are B2B products, delivery would include a phased-production rollout to those customers, based on their roles, locations etc. I have developed both software and data products in the healthcare and social

Went on a short coffee date with a person who was nice, but I just don’t think we’re compatible. What’s a kind text I can send to explain, after they said we should see each other again?

Woman I went on one date with keeps me informed on what she's doing. I.e. Seeing her girlfriend or on her way to a birthday party. Not used to this level of transparency after just one date. We do have a second date planned. Thoughts?

How long did you date your SO before moving in with them?

Need advice and help.

I have realized I grew up in a household where my dad did not treat my mom as an equal. He belittles her, is rude and convinced his way is the only way.

It is painful to say, but some of this shows up in me and in my relationship. I am starting to catch myself, and it to me seems to be more of a reaction than anythjng that is ever intentional.

Wondering if anyone has dealt with something similar, and any success in making changes besides therapy. Cont. in comments

Did anyone hate wedding planning? I’m constantly considering cancelling the wedding cuz I honestly can’t believe how much drama it’s causing with all family members.......

Asking for a friend - anyone staying in a marriage just for the kid(s)?

It's not like the marriage is terrible or unhealthy, but they would take an out if not for having had the kids.

Anyone else experience this? I'm wondering how common this is.

why do i struggle when my s/o isn’t texting me? ik they’re not cheating on me, ik they still love me, all that jazz.

but for some reason i’m not at peace when they take some time to themselves.

any tips or advice?

My fiancé will NOT stop talking about her ex. After I found out they were texting arguing she justified it by saying it was about the dogs and not them. Even though Her social media is full of his pics. She still sends him $50 a month for dog food, still goes to work right by his place and suspiciously needs keys. I try to bring it up and I get dismantled for being too mean and making “false accusations.” How much more obvious can it be?

So what do men really look for looks wise? Is it really all about the face?

Hi Fellow Moms/Wives!❤️
Very taboo question.

Anyone else have a hubby with a very low sex drive? I initiate most of the time and it really makes me feel neglected. I have talked to him about it but I think we just have different views on how to feel connected? I think once every 2 weeks is harsh. I prefer 3x-4x a week but he says that is a lot. Am I crazy to expect of this?

For those of you in your mid-20’s, how often do you go on dates with your significant other? In a serious relationship for the first time since college and trying to gauge what folks consider normal for dating frequency (excluding nights in). Context - we’re 25, dating for 3 months, live 5 mins away from each other, decent WLB

How many dates do you give someone if you don’t feel a “spark” in the first 1-2 dates but genuinely enjoy their company (I.e. talking and learning about them etc)?

Do you think you and your significant other should have similar personalities? My significant other and I are doing long distance and I feel like when I FaceTime with him, I emote more and show interest by asking more questions but from his end, he doesn’t always have a reaction or just nods, and it makes me feel like he’s uninterested. On his end he sees it as he’s comfortable.

I’ve been in a relationship now for two years. We are living together. We talk about the future etc. I could easily see myself marrying her. However, I have an issue… cont

Have you walked away from somebody you loved? And why?

Dear Men - Need your perspective.

So… 3.5 year relationship came crashing in Jan due to covid depression, work burn out, lockdown etc. We have stayed in contact and recently he has come around to apologizing and considering getting back together. However he also revealed he started seeing someone casually 4 weeks ago and technically is cheating on her by meeting me for coffee and to discuss this. I’m upset that he’s dating others but shouldn’t be right? I mean, I did the same. Still hurts though. And I told him to sort that out

So I have been seeing a guy for 4 months. We have a pay disparity.. he earns less than I do (by quite a bit). He has mentioned a few times that he’s worried I’ll get bored of him when I know he can’t afford the same things I can. I think we are beginning to move past this, but now he’s starting to mention things like ‘I am really broke this month’, and last weekend he told me his mum has lost her job and he’ll have to probably pay her rent. I have a lot of sympathy for his situation … tbc

Been having trouble moving on since girlfriend ended relationship 3 weeks ago after 2+ years of dating. Before ending it she came over 3 weeks prior to basically give me a chance to work things out and we had a good discussion but then I went back into our routine and didn’t really fight for it or have serious follow up convos that we needed. Now I just have so many regrets that I let her go. I know we still love each other and left on “good” terms but can’t forgive myself for my lack of action.

If someone recommended you reach out to a mutual friend to get to know them for a relationship, do you ever mention that to the person?