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I'm too poor to relate to the salary aspect of your problem, but I do relate to the part about being unfairly prejudiced by my inlaws. It sucks. The only way to gain that respect back is through your husband, he needs to defend your position and set strong boundaries. I would not be okay with my parents talking shit about my husband that isn't true, your husband shouldn't put up with it either.
I worked at blk. Totally agree.
Taking advantage of my husband's success. I am not sure if they are willingly ignoring my own success or are unaware of my latest career successes. They also blame me for a lack of grandchildren. Neither my husband nor myself want kids but they act like I'm the reason we don't have kids. (Note they have three other children who all have kids so they do have a handful of grandchildren). Should I confront them? Would it be wrong to tell them that I make more money than their son so I couldn't possibly be leeching off of him and that we have decided together to not have kids? I can't take their comments any longer but I don't want to embarrass my husband in front of his family...
Your husband should always be on your side. End of story. He needs to be the one that sticks up to his family and tell them the truth about your job and kids. If he's too embarassed or cowardly then that's on him, not your problrm. However, it highlights a crack that either needs to be repaired or broken off completely.
The feminist side of me says, "if men can brag about their salary and walk like big shots, why can't you?". The relationship side of me says to run what you say by him first, so you don't embarrass him and make enemies with his family