My employee has RBF and sometimes I think she's angry or bored on the project. I know I can reach out to her PL but has anyone dealt with this and has advice on how to navigate?

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I have that face, but actively, on purpose. Try my best to make myself as unapproachable as possible 24/7. Don't want to talk to any of you a*holes if I don't have to 🫡✌️

funnylikesmartuplifting

Or just let her have RBF. I think she’d seriously consider quitting if her manager tried to police her facial expression. Yes, you have to fit a consulting mold but that’s an old way of thinking and poor management tactics for control

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Leave them and their RBF alone. If you are wondering how they are feeling, just ask.

likeuplifting

This is me. Major RBF, quiet, introverted. Makes people think I’m a spy of sorts. If she’s the same personality as me, I wouldn’t mind you asking me about it because I already know. But ask me to fix it and you’ll get an earful. The right way to do it is to ask how she feels about your project, your management style and if there’s anything lacking that you can do to make her life better, easier, and more pleasant. If there’s nothing then keep your mouth shut from now on. There’s bound to be someone in the world that won’t like your face either, but they’re not cribbing about it.

likesmart

Really Bad Farts?

funny

Why would you reach out to her PL about this? Let me get this straight, you want to escalate as first step, not a waste of the PL’s time or anything.

Maybe talk to her to see what’s going on, or here’s another idea- how does it impact you exactly? She’s not obligated to put on a performance for you to make you more comfortable, she’s your coworker - like you, she’s in meetings working, concentrating to get things done.

Honesly, leave her alone and get back to work.

likehelpful

Ok, valid. There are much more reliable markers of team members’ unhappiness/ dissatisfaction at the job than an ‘RBF’ (wholly subjective take of an expression- some people just look serious when they’re working or due to genetics), so I would challenge your starting assumptions a bit.

It’s good to note your intentions are well-meaning, but this post doesn’t necessarily convey that. People can also sense when you’re too focused/ obsessed with certain aspects about them, so maybe that’s adding to her being uncomfortable, which you’re noting, which could then cause actual job performance issues. You could be spot on, she could be unhappy, but good to consider other possibilities and your role.

I would see how they interact with others and if there are any markers, job-related, that indicate unhappiness with work rather than this. Change in engagement, any out of norm (for them) behavior, and so on. Also note their preferences for privacy before jumping into what could be a highly personal conversation if not job related that they may not want if you’re truly wanting to look out for them and not just wanting to start drama. Keep it professional as good practice, build trust and let people come to you.

smart

This is why I botox without regret. No expression whatsoever. 👊🏻

helpfulfunny

Can't you just ask her directly? Maybe she's unaware

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You don't need to confront about RBF but ask her about her overall feelings regarding the project or of she feels challenged

I had a coffee chat with an exec years ago. At the end of the chat, he expressed relief I didn't dump some huge issue on him because I looked angry and upset. He encouraged me to smile more and show the positive side of emotion. I didn't even realize I was doing that.

Try that approach after a meeting with her.

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Ooh, no. Please don’t ask about my home life unless I know you really well, or I’ve offered up some detail. It’s not that it’s inappropriate work talk, it’s just that it’s my door to open, not yours.

How jobless are you that this is what you focus on? Go do something useful instead of creeping on your reports.

helpful

Have a conversation with her about her role and workload if you want to know how she’s feeling about it / managing it. RBF is a non-factor.

like

It took me way too long to figure out what RBF is.

Tell her she would prettier if she smiled more.

Yeah - and then lawyer up. Coz I bet she will. I would if some idiot said that to me.

likesmarthelpful

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