My husband says he’s tired when he gets home from work. He needs to exercise, says he’s 2 tired in the PM, but often skips it in the AM. At times he likes 2 walk, but if I’m busy in the PM w/ work, chores, or fitness, he usually skips it. He doesn’t like my exrcse routines. He also doesn’t want to do chores in the PM. He usually sits on the couch. Is this a mental block or something else? I say he should accomplish at least 1 chore and exrcse b4 TV/Web for cleanliness & health, but he won’t.

Posting as :
works at
You are currently posting as works at
Highlighted IconHIGHLIGHTED

I wouldn’t give him a chore like he’s a kid. Some guys, even if you don’t mean it that way…they feel it’s like mom giving him a chore.. try figuring out what motivates him…like some guys are motivated by sex… or when he gets home greet him w a glass of his fav drink. Guys are task oriented but motivated by a “treat” try it.. try anything that u know motivated him.. guys also like to feel powerful.. try the “honey I can’t do this, ur way stronger or smarter than me .. can you help me w this… I’ll make it worth your while. 😉 “ try it just don’t presented like a chore.

like

You don’t think that’s a double standard? I work from home, but it is just as stressful if not more stressful than his job and I manage to do chores without all that….I could never pull off seeming genuine doing that anyway.

I do think that exercise/wellness are not things that you can tell someoen else they need to do. they will start to hide their behaviors from you and start to resent you a lot. I deal with some similar struggles in my marriage but my approach has always been just to lead by example, offer support, talk about my own fitness goals/journey, and it has a positive impact because it's not me pointing a finger at him. I want my husband to always know that I love him and support him regardless of what he's going through. And sometimes our lifestyle is more active than other times. I find that normally when I feel like this it's because I'm frustrated with my own health/fitness

like

I don’t think he likes to talk about my goals. He has implied that I’m going too hard. I know if I say nothing, he’ll do nothing; he did say I should ask if he’s worked out and compliment him. The chore part is a struggle…

Recent IconRecent

Man here: From my perspective it seems like he has a sh!t job so when he comes home he just wants to zone out. And there is also something going on at home in the relationship which you both have that’s causing him to be apathetic. You need to sit down and see if he is open to talking to you about what he’s going through. Unfortunately as men we keep a lot of sh!t in and we typically don’t know how to cope and then things blow up because of the pressure that’s built up.

like

Not sure if yours was a love marriage or an arranged one, but if I were a woman regardless of how I came to be with my partner, I would try being loving. For example try simply sitting next to him and taking his arm and wrap it around you and snuggling up to him. Don’t even ask him any questions just watch whatever he is watching with you. It gives him both the mental space he needs and makes him aware that you don’t need anything from him in order for you to show affection. I think the problems you’re talking about are superficial and not addressing underlining issues that are definitely going on with him and perhaps even yourself in your relationship.

like

I'm in the same situation with my wife. I feel very let down because when we were dating, we worked out together and I was looking forward to a lifetime of an active lifestyle. I also "settled" with her although she was carrying a lot more pounds than I find physically attractive because I felt that if we continued being active, the extra weight would fall off. Hasn't happened. I'm really not looking forward to having kids with her because I know that will give her even more of an excuse to march towards obesity. Chores aren't an issue though. She's an excellent cook and we are both effective at keeping the home very clean.

like

BCG1 - the opinion on BT1 is that it takes a garbage human being to marry someone despite finding them physically suboptimal in the hope that they can fix that once they’re married and then not wanting to have kids because of the physical impact that it’ll have on that person’s appearance. It’s some toxic body shaming garbage.

It sounds like you’ve decided he needs to exercise, not him. Unless he feels it’s something he wants/needs to do, then he’s going to struggle to proactively do it. So it comes down to you being unhappy with him for not doing something that he doesn’t want to do, yet does not impact you directly.

Sooooo… get over it or get out.

like

Cool. The health thing still needs to be something he feels he wants/needs to do.

But overall, he sounds lazy. Did y’all not live together before getting married? That would have been a healthy red flag for me if he didn’t bother doing chores.

Maybe he needs a physical. He could be iron deficient. I know iron deficiency causes exhaustion.

like

I used to have that problem; I should ask him about this.

like

Or a workout buddy (probs a dude) to help motivate him. New workout clothes or shoes can be a good motivator!

like

I tried suggesting a male workout buddy; he won’t go for it : (

I don’t understand how he can’t make himself clean, exercise in the evening since that would free up our weekends and improve his health; if working out in the morning is difficult due to work/fatigue, why not use the 2 + hrs available in the evening? We don’t have kids yet.

My husband is similar laziest person, i am sick of asking him to do anything weather it is about his own work or any household work all things are up to me. He somewhat does things when he is with me but when his parents visits he gets sticked with them sitting in a corner in living room on couch, no one can ask him to do anything when they are around, and best part is they are so kind they dont ask their kiddo to do anything. Parvarish hi galat haato me hui h 😵

Jeeze Louise when you can’t read abbreviations without coordinating them with work acronyms you know you need a break. I legit read PM as project management and am as account manager. I had to reread this twice to make sense

Related Posts

Got the booster 2 weeks ago. Office has been exposed to Covid on Thursday last week. Am I just supposed to get tested? Anything else I’m supposed to do?

like

F*****-up story…please be constructive (but also open & direct)
With my wife for 14 years, 2 kids under 8y - both under a lot of pressure bc Covid/work/private life/… and have been (unconsciously) running away from our couple not working “since a long time” (dixit my wife). We want to try and fix it, but I also met someone new (not sure if she would even want me) and wondering if it’s worth fixing it (since we are trying/running/avoiding it for years) - just worried about the kids…any advice

like

I miss being able to innocently and naively fall in love and trust that things will work out. After being so disappointed twice in a row i just feel like now i cannot trust guys anymore and what they say. :( once u learn something, you cannot unlearn

likehelpful

My friend just got out of a relationship and hooked up with his ex's best friend a week later. They're now dating and seeing each other everyday.
I couldn't help but feel like this wasn't an appropriate thing to do for both parties. He also revealed that he cheated on his past exes.

I'm naturally feeling a bit weary of his character and questioning whether this is a friend I want to keep close in my life. Perhaps I'm being too judgmental?

like

My two young toddlers are home from daycare for the next 1.5 weeks for the holidays, and I have off work to watch them. It’s only been 2 days, and I’m so exhausted that I’m counting down the days until I go back to work and they are in daycare. Does anyone have any tips for enjoying this time? I love my kids so much, but how do SAHMs do this every day? I’m so drained already, and I have no patience left…

like

Hope everyone is doing well and happy, recovering from the heart break ❤️

like

Any update on work from office in TCS? Are they still calling ? As no. of cases are increasing

like

529 Plan VERSUS Prepaid

We live in Florida and currently have a Freshman in High School and a 16 month old. We hear from our friends and family with college bound children "I wish we would have done Florida PrePaid." After obviously ignoring this for years, we are finally trying to do it before "it's too late" for both children.

Does anyone have recommendations on which plan to go with for each child? I once did the pros and cons on a whiteboard and it seemed like 529 was better.

like

Started vyvance. I’m eating a lot, super hydrated, no caffeine and I still feel super weird. I’m calm and my brain feels great but physically my eyes are soo dry and my body just feels disassociated. It’s only been three days. Does this pass?

like

I started a new job a month ago and that just so happened to be when my birth control decided to screw with my emotions. I can barely hold it together already and I have the added stress of a new job and it being busy season. I don’t know what to do. I cry multiple times daily. I don’t know how to keep going.

like

I just started a new job and am about to be 36. I want to start a family but I feel like I should be waiting due to this new job. However I don’t want to miss out. I’m thinking about freezing my eggs

like

Big sister on the left is not happy she has to share the bed. 🤣🤣🤣

Post Photo
likefunny

Any recommendations for the best cities in Europe to visit with young kids (5, 2, 0)? Looking for a week after visiting Paris or London

like

Debating when to have the first baby… would you say having a baby is totally worth it ? Worth all the struggles and sacrifices? Or should I wait an extra year just to save more money and enjoy life now without the extra sacrifices… (female 27 & want to have 2 kids)

My mental health has taken a nose dive. I’m considering breaking up with my fiancee so she doesn’t have to go through the hassle of dealing with me anymore.

like

Anyone have wrist guard recommendations for weightlifting? I have small wrists and they don’t love a lot of pressure.

Hi All,
Just want your suggestion on this to help me decide.
I've been working in QA team for big data project and recently I've got offers from Startup and service based MNC as data engineer for the role of Data Engineer.
I've not worked on the actual development of ETL batches till now but I want to learn and grow gradually.

What kind of organisation would be best for me considering my mental health as well because I take too much stress ?

Thanks 🙏

like

Anyone noticed that with aerobic / cardio exercises it gets more difficult to focus? It is like my mind a TV and someone else gets the remote and goes through every channel every 30 seconds or so

like

Has the overturning of Roe v. Wade significantly impacted anyone's relationships? I lost two friends who were pro-life and on the verge of losing another. Wondering if I'm being too rigid in my perspective or if this is normal in Texas

like

Anyone have recs for a Nephrologist/Kidney doc?

like

More Posts

When should I tell my manager / “recommendor” I am planning to apply to bschool? Applying R1 this fall

like

User experience mgr salary? I support six product teams and eight reports. 20+ years experience

Hi folks! If I quit this week, will I still get my bonus? (My LWD will be around September 26-27)

like

Diwali gift scene at GDS??

like

I am trying to be intentional with the order of my instruction for my reading standards and grammar standards next year. Any scope and sequence suggestions or examples?

like

Has anyone heard of The Next Step program at Dartmouth’s Tuck school of business? I’ve been Encouraged to apply

like

What’re the best neighborhoods for going out in Denver? Moving there for summer and trying to get a lay of the land. Hobbies include drinking, drinking outside, drinking on rooftops, drinking by pool

like

I’m 22 and single. What can I do on weekends that isn’t go out to bars?

like

Looking for little gifts, candy, drawing pencils. etc to help build student morale during this difficult year

like

Hey guys,

I am from tax and i applied for Pune location from hyd which has now been approved. We're expected to go to office by Jan'23.
However, i wanted to visit the office sometime this year. Is the office open yet and available to book through magnet? Has anyone visited the office personally yet?

like

Has anyone dealt with a lack of praise from attorneys? I'm not someone who needs to hear "good job" all the time, but we just got a huge deal closed that I worked really hard on and had a lot of overtime. And once it closed, the lead attorney praised the other attorneys, and said nothing about me or my work. I might just be overly sensitive, but it kind of stung. Thoughts?

like

Need a read on this.

MM shop, inv team role, I did a final round last week (my XXth IV so far) with one of the GPs. I honestly thought it went great. Haven’t heard a thing since though. Recruiter thinks I’m still in it cause of Christmas-Hol.

What do we think: Am I still in it or not a chance?

like

Can someone please refer me to KPMG?

like

Anyone who has made the shift from a regular toothbrush to an electric? What were your reasons? Also do you think an electric is much better from an overall oral hygiene perspective?

like

Just got an email from the NY State board that my CPA Liscense application is on hold because my partner forgot to put the date on the experience form. 🙄.

like
like

Pepsico PepsiCo or S&P Global....
Please suggest.
Roles:- Product Analyst - PepsiCo. Product owner - S&P Global India

CTC is very similar

What if your second round of interview was average? Will there be 3rd round? Or you will be rejected and no the process will be concluded then and there? How long so they take to send rejection intimation?

Is financial engineering a thing?

like

Hey Folks,

Can anyone refer me for SAP CS/SD consultant.
YOE : 2

like

New to Fishbowl?

Download the Fishbowl app to
unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.
That was just a preview…
Sign Up to see all discussions
  • Discover what it’s like to work at companies from real professionals
  • Get candid advice from people in your field in a safe space
  • Chat and network with other professionals in your field
Sign up in seconds to unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.

Already a user?
Login here

Share

Embed this post

Copy and paste embed code on your site

Preview

Download the
Fishbowl app

See what’s happening in your industry
from the palm of your hand.

A phone with Fishbowl app

Scan your QR code to download
Fishbowl app on your mobile

Download app

Sign up for free to view this conversation on Fishbowl

By continuing you agree to Terms of Use and Privacy Policy

Already have an account? Log in

Sign up for free to continue using Fishbowl

By continuing you agree to Terms of Use(New) and Privacy Policy(New)
Messaging rates may apply

Already have an account? Log in

For account settings, visit Fishbowl on Desktop Browser or

General

Legal