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And sometimes being honest is okay. "I'm sorry, I know you told me your name a few minutes ago, but could you remind me again?" "There is so much happening around us right now, and it's so exciting, but my senses are a little overloaded. Would you mind if we stepped over to the side of the room where it looks a little quieter? I'm enjoying this conversation, and I'd really like to make surei don't miss anything you have to say. *Move to a less intense area* Ahh this is better. Couldyou tell me your name one more time?" if you're uncomfortable asking for their name again, ask if they have a business card they could share with you. I agree with the person who said to take notes on your phone--business cards are a great thing to take notes on too.
I totally get it—what helps me is prepping a few go-to questions ahead of time and jotting notes in my phone right after meeting someone. I also try to schedule follow-up one-on-ones, where the environment is quieter and easier to manage. It takes extra effort, but the quality of connections tends to be better.
Rising Star
I prep questions to ask someone else about what they do, and ask if they mind if I take notes in a small notepad. I just tell them it helps me remember, and no one has objected yet. In fact, I think they like how engaged I am to listen carefully and write down what they say, versus most conversations where everyone is waiting to talk instead of listening.
I think it helps to go into the situation with clear goals—so you don’t feel overwhelmed.
Example: at a 4-hr networking event, I will only stay for 3 hrs and can leave sooner if I get 3 solid new connections where I get a number and/or email and share a meaningful story, connection moment.
The key here is:
- Finite Commitment—reduce it down to what you can handle, which starts off less burdensome and overwhelming to limit the anxiety of a “marathon” endurance test.
- Energy Directed to Meaning—a focus on quality connection vs quantity connection. With a limited time frame make your effort count, push yourself out of comfort a few times vs the whole time. Be observant, bold, use humor, in opening lines with certain folks you WANT to engage with. Be picky, have openers prepared and be yourself.
Precious energy will go toward networking in a way that works best for you. It may relax you a bit which always helps with performance. And best of all, you’ll be acknowledging who you are vs forcing yourself to be something you aren’t.
Doing it “your way” may deplete you less than you’d expect and might increase your confidence and optimism for the next networking opportunity.
Thanks for sharing this and can totally relate. Agree with some of the other folks here that having a few, targeted questions you can ask help. If people are comfortable sharing something about their personal life too (e.g., a hobby, an upcoming event) that helps makes things more personal and is an easier way to remember them. It's also a nice way to re-connect with them and them about it in the future.