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Saw your post in the main bowl, so will comment on start with more desi elements and then include regular ones.
1) Gender roles and expectations around the house. While most of our generation believes in equal footing, there are still people (both men and women) who prefer a more traditional set up
2) Financial/other support of parents, including them living with you long term in old age
3) Major career/personal aspirations
4) Financial habits/quality of life: do you like to save, spend, enjoy a balance
5) Kids: when, how many, parental roles and taking time off work to support
6) Love language: how you’d like your partner to show their affection (words, actions, gifts etc)
7) Priorities: a tough one, but specifically- acknowledging that you two are a unit. And you will put each other first before the rest of the family.
Yup. And hopefully you’ll pick a partner who sees the situation the same as you. And vice versa.
But there may be times where you have to pick a side when the decision/opinion isn’t unanimous
Relationship with parents, specially decision making is a huge for me on the list. Some people mention while dating that they are independent but sadly many of their decisions are taken by their family which takes a big toll on the relationship going further.