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Me: Today will be a great day
My anxiety:

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Insta ads these days be like 🤦🏻♀️

GM fellas. What mood are we in today

The new company I’m at now sent me an email from an email address that was HR@companyName.careers saying I was accepted for the position. They gave me paperwork to fill out and sign to accept the position
I fill out the paperwork and send it back to them and it goes through… then a few days later I go back to the email to say something else and I get this…?
Then today I got a check from the company In the mail to setup my home office, and it’s signed by someone I’ve never met before or heard of…?
What…..

I don't want to work today.
Musk to reverses Trump ban on Twitter

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Ask them to do the same on my work laptop
Pro
Chop them in their throat.
Call ASOC.
Chief
Time to waterboard your sibling
Conversation Starter
Put it in rice
Chief
Serving your sibling with rice? That's dark... Even for me.
I'd at least give them the dignity of being served with something substantive like polenta or maybe orzo.
Pistol duel at dawn. Defend your honor.
My mother just blurted "What, slap him? WhatdoIdo?" in response to this question. Now she keeps asking me what she should do.
Meanwhile, I was contemplating murder and cover-up
Pro
is my sibling still under warranty?
Get a new sibling
Put siblings in rice for 1 month
Pro
Read this post carefully and you may be able to salvage situation. You need to go to Home Depot and buy a flame thrower and fire extinguisher. First start the flamethrower and keep fire extinguisher ready as you don’t want to burn to ashes - and while you’re doing this to your sibling, order a new laptop..
Rising Star
My siblings have no money so I wouldn’t bother doing anything other than just fixing it/buying a new one.
Community Builder
Spill water on sibling and hope they short circuit?
Conversation Starter
Buy a new one
Rising Star
A new sibling that is. I assume you’ve already killed the other.
Rising Star
Fix it.
Why’d they do it though?
Assuming it was an accident - hopefully your sibling is nice enough to help at least pay for the repairs, otherwise just eat the cost and get it repaired. Things happen, don’t let it ruin your relationship with them, it’s just a laptop in the end.
Was it accidentally?