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If I was in your shoes, I would try to be local as much as possible and spend more time with all 3 kids. You 10 and 12 year old kids need more time for next 5 years.
My wife has half bothers and sisters and my biggest recommendation is to treat them and encourage them to view each other as full siblings. I get the age gap can be hard for the kids but if you don’t foster a direct sibling relationship it can turn into and us and them thing as they get older.
Congratulations on the new one.
Congrats! Biggest question to me is are you discussing your concerns regarding your 2 older kids with your wife?
I assume she shares your commitment to being a good dad to them. She should be part of this plan.
Other weekend
I don't have much advice to offer, but congratulations!
Yeah those weekends are sacred and we always have a good time. I was thinking maybe we’d spend a few hours with the baby all together and then we could mostly do stuff just me and my older kids. But I’m worried about pissing off my wife, leaving her with the baby for extended periods on the weekend. Her mom is willing to help as well. I guess we will figure it out.
She does. But honestly their relationship is not great. We have tried to make it warmer, but realized that as long as everyone is civil, it’s fine
Good luck OP. Sounds like you are trying to do all the right things!